SEEN AND HEARD, YESTERDAY IN PICTURE FORM . . . . SCHLEPT IN BEYOND MY USUAL SATURDAY ALLOWANCE, MOUNTED THE PENIS MOBILE AT MIDDAY . . . . HIGHTAILED IT DOWN TO BRUNS, HIGHWAY PATROL EVERYWHERE . . . . A KILLER DAY IN THE SADDLE, SUNSHINE SUPERSTAR !!!!

END OF A WORKING WEEK I'M PRETTY KEEN TO LEAVE BEHIND . . . . COME MONDAY I'LL LIKELY BE MADE REDUNDANT . . . . I'M TAKING IT AS A SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE THAT MY DECADE IN THE EMPLOY OF THE STRAIGHTS IS ABOUT ALL I'VE GOT IN ME . . . . LOOKING FORWARD TO WHAT THE FUTURE MAY BRING . . . . ONE DOOR CLOSES AND ALL THAT, BLAH BLAH BLAH.

ASSORTED MOMENTS FROM THE LAST TWENTY FOUR HOURS . . . . THE PIECE DE RESISTANCE WAS GETTING MY LEG OVER THE PENIS MOBILE FOR THREE HOURS TONIGHT . . . . REGARDLESS OF WHAT MONDAY MIGHT BRING, ALL IS WELL IN THE WORLD . . . . SHIT COULD BE SO MUCH WORSE, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING . . . . FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS, PFFFT, I STILL GOT IT GOOD RELATIVELY SPEAKING.

 ALDANA . . . . COMING OUTTA THE TURN, ON THE PIN, LINED UP AND ONE HANDED, LEGEND

 THE COCKPIT OF THE VINO MOBILE . . . . MADE THE KESSEL RUN IN UNDER TWELVE PARSECS

 AT 12.20 LAST NIGHT THIS CAME ON THE BOX . . . . SO MUCH FOR AN EARLY NIGHT IN THE SACK

 PUT THIS OLD WARHORSE ON TODAY . . . . GOT IT NEW IN '93 . . . . SHOULDN'T EVEN BE ALIVE

 DASHBOARD DOUBLE ACT . . . . CHILDHOOD MEMORIES ALWAYS CLOSE AT HAND, MASCOT DUTY

 THE CABIN OF ROSCOE'S C10 . . . . PINEAPPLE POPSICLE, PULL THE PIN AND LOB AT NEAREST IDIOT

 JOHNNO'S '04 Z1000 . . . . KWAKA SURE GOT THEIR VALUE OUTTA THE GPz MOTOR CONCEPT

 BLING TO THE MAX . . . . I DON'T GET THE CVO CAPER, FACTORY CUSTOM, EXPLAIN THAT TO ME

 UNDOUBTEDLY ONE OF MY MOST LOVED BITS . . . . PATINA, PATINA, PATINA, FTW MOFO

 HALFWAY COFFEE STOP TONIGHT AT THE GOLDEN ARCHES . . . . LIGHT ONE UP AND REFLECT

THE GOODNESS OF THE GOODSON . . . . HAND MADE, SAND CAST GLORY . . . . FINTASTIC 

ABOUT TO LOSE THE SILLY FORWARDS AND INSTALL THE MIDS AND SPEED MERCHANT PEGS

TODAY, THE STUFF THAT WAS NOMINALLY WORTH RECORDING . . . . MY SECOND FORD FOCUS, RELIABLE, SAFE, CAPABLE AND BLAND AS BEIGE . . . . WENT FOR A SQUIRT ON THE HEMI DRESSER HOGGLY THING . . . . I'LL NEVER RUN APES AS LONG AS MY ARSE POINTS TO THE GROUND.

EVEN A CONTEMPORARY SMALL CAR CAN POSSESS STANCE . . . . MY 2013 FOCUS, THE VINO MOBILE

TO BE HONEST, DESPITE THE SONS OF ANARCHY APPEARANCE, IT WASN'T TOO BAD, NOT ME THOUGH

THE BOSSANOVA KIDS "DANCETRAIN" . . . . MY SECOND BAND CIRCA 1987 COVERING MY FIRST BAND'S FIRST SINGLE . . . . NO ELECTRONIC DRUMS HERE FOLKS . . . . WE WERE ONCE DESCRIBED IN A MUSIC MAGAZINE AS 'ELVIS MEETS THE MC5' . . . . SHIT, I'LL TAKE THAT ONE THANKS.

WE WERE OFTEN CALLED 'THREE WOGS AND A DOG', THE GUITARIST, MARIO SPINA, WAS ITALIAN, THE DRUMMER, JOHNNY HIPPOCRATES, WAS GREEK AND THE BASS PLAYER, TERRY STEPHENS, OF EGYPTIAN DESCENT . . . . MARIO DIED OF A BRAIN TUMOUR ON CHRISTMAS DAY NINE YEARS AGO, EVERY WEEK IN THE STUDIO TERRY AND I DO OUR MUSICAL THING WITH MARS' ASHES SITTING IN AN URN ON TOP OF THE EFFECTS RACK . . . . IT'S A SPECIAL AND BEAUTIFUL THING. 

I DON'T MIND LOSING OR FAILING, ESPECIALLY OF MY OWN VOLITION . . . . HOWEVER, I DETEST HAVING MY SHIT FUCKED UP BY SOMEBODY ELSE . . . . OR, WORSE, DOING NOTHING TO STOP IT HAPPENING . . . . THAT'S WHAT I DID IN MY FIRST BAND, I LET SOMEONE ELSE TAKE THE WHEEL.

Notice anything odd about the photo, not including my hyperactive sweat glands, stacked quiff and effete hand gesture, nor is it my lucky towel, or the Peavey bass rig lying on its side, no, its's the fucking ridiculous Simmons electronic drum kit wasting space behind me . . . . I mean, as if drummers aren't bad enough in their own right, they decide sometimes to have a half mind of their own and actually do something without being told to or seeking group approval first, under any set of normal circumstances, things they never do . . . . as 'The Ballistics' we were a psychobilly/rockabilly/punk hybrid act, sweaty, loud, ugly and thoroughly flat out, we were braining it, getting the best support gigs, headlining to full houses, touring the country, free piss, road crew, PA and truck on permanent hire, all the gold we could eat, it was post punk, alternate rock heaven . . . . the last thing we needed or deserved was a hair brained plan by our chief noisemaker and non-metronome, to go out and drop three fucking grand of the band's money on a dinky idiot syndrum kit, but, being a drummer by name and nature, he did, and, I let it happen. I should've realised there and then that the entire shitfight was doomed to plummet into the ground like the Pan Am jumbo over Lockerbie . . . . what I should have done was say, 'hey, Cam, this is my fucking band and we're playing rockabilly not doing Ultravox covers, you either take that ridiculous collection of Tupperware back to the supermarket or you're looking for another gig', but I didn't, and the rest is just so much piss and wind . . . . not that I'm bitter and twisted about it . . . . much . . . . I mean, 1983 was a long time ago and I'm over it . . . . sort of.

A PICKUP TRUCK LOAD OF COOL FOR THE MONDAY BLUES . . . . THIS PAIR JUST TURNED UP AT ROSCOE'S PLACE OF EMPLOY, STRAIGHT OFF THE BOAT . . . . C10 OVERLOAD, PICK IT UP !!!

IT'S EVERY MAN'S BIRTHRIGHT TO OWN A PICKUP TRUCK ONCE IN HIS LIFE . . . . C'MON BUBBA !!!

SUNDAY TOO FAR AWAY, EVEN WHEN IT'S COMING DOWN . . . . A GOOD BLOKE AND HIS FALSE TRUMPET, MET HIM TWENTY YEARS AGO WHEN HE GOT HIS FIRST . . . . FOUR BIKES LATER AND HE'S A HINCKLEY HAULER THROUGH AND THROUGH . . . . NOW, DUMP EM OUT GASSER STYLE.

FROM THE HEIGHTS OF SUCCESS TO THE DEPTHS OF LIFE'S TURGID MIASMA . . . . IT'S BEEN A PRETTY FUCKING FREAKY WEEK ALL ROUND, MORE ON THAT ANOTHER TIME . . . . A FEW SHOTS FROM LAST EVENING HIGH ATOP THE MAGIC MOUNTAIN AND TODAY'S PURPLE PENIS CLEANING.

COME TO SUNNY QUEENSLAND, BEAUTIFUL ONE DAY, PERFECT THE NEXT . . . . PISSING RAIN, BOSS PROBLEMS, WANKERS IN FIVE STAR'S . . . . SELLING LIVER DAMAGE AND DEBAUCHERY

A MORE PLEASANT PART OF THE DAY ON THE VINO TRAIL . . . . THERE'S A KILLER ON THE ROAD

 SUPER LUMINOSITY 6.30 P.M . . . . MY WATCH AFTER AN ACCIDENTAL DOSE OF INTERIOR LIGHT

 SUNDRY COOL SWINGARM SKIRTSTER I PINCHED FROM SOMEWHERE LAST YEAR . . . . LATER, I'M DONE

SURFERS PARADISE, GOLD COAST, AUSTRALIA . . . . THIS IS WHERE I LIVE . . . . EVEN I GIVE IT A BAD RAP BUT SOMETIMES, IT'S SIMPLY SPECTACULAR . . . . RAINBOW OVER A PLASTIC PARADISE