Sunday, 14 April 2013
NARROWNECK ON YET ANOTHER SHITTY DAY IN SURFERS PARASITE . . . . SQUIRTING AROUND ON THE PURPLE PENIS RUNNING INTO FRIENDS AND GETTING RUN OFF THE ROAD BY IDIOT FUCKING BUS DRIVERS . . . . SUPPORT LEE BENDER, VISIT 'ONESICKRACE BLOGSPOT' AND GET THE SURVIVAL STORY OF THE YEAR . . . . ONE OF THE FEW STRETCHES OF BEACH THAT HASN'T BEEN WASHED INTO THE OCEAN . . . . ONCE THE INDY CAR BEACH STRAIGHT . . . . DULL RACING HQ.
I don't know what it's like in other parts of the planet but here in many cities of Oz we have this law about giving way to omnibuses when they're re-entering the traffic flow from the side of the road. You're driving or riding along when suddenly six feet in front of you a great steel whale breaches from the kerb and barges back into the lane you happen to be occupying . . . . there's giving way and then there's abusing the entire fucking concept and in so doing putting any poor fucker in the way in real peril of getting seriously taken out by twelve tons of supersized Volvo people mover, nowhere to go with full traffic in the outside lane and the arse end of the Swedish land whale filling every inch of forward vision . . . . time to get jiggy with it folks, hit hard on the right 'bar, swerving left behind and around the good ship arseclown, up on the pegs like Mick bloody Andrews, which, unlike the old Bonnie's, isn't easy with forward controls and near double the weight, mount the kerb at an angle hoping there's no punters on hoof using the footpath, avoid the now looming Besser block wall and the bushes and pull the Penis Mobile to a halt . . . . thanks a bunch Mr Bus Driver, you fucking jerk !!!