HEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY . . . . I'M BACK ON THE JOB AND RARING TO GO, WELL, AT LEAST MODERATELY ENTHUSED . . . . I HOPE Y'ALL BEEN LOOKING AFTER YOURSELVES AND NOT FLINGING YOUR FLESH DOWN THE BLACKTOP . . . . I'VE DELIBERATELY STAYED AWAY FROM CHECKING OUT EVERYTHING I USUALLY DO AND LOOKING FORWARD TO CATCHING UP WITH THE CREW I LOVE . . . . BLOGLAND, SOMEWHERE THERE'S A SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE.

SERVICED THE PURPLE PENIS TODAY, DECIDED TO RUN 'LUCAS' OILS IN BOTH MOTOR AND GEARBOX, NEVER USED THE STUFF PREVIOUSLY BUT HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITAY IT'S WORTH MORE THAN A SQUIRT OF BILLY GOAT'S PISS . . . . REAR PADS NEEDED FAIRLY URGENT INTERVENTION, FUCK, I'D HEARD A FEW LITTLE SQUEAKS IN THE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS AND HAD TAKEN A GOOD SQUIZ AT THEM, PLENTY OF MEAT LEFT . . . . OR SO I THUNKED . . . . STUPIDLY, I'D ONLY SUSSED THE OUTBOARD PAD, THE INBOARD MODEL WAS DOWN TO FUCKING BARE-ARSED METAL, ONLY JUST BUT ENOUGH TO NECESSITATE THROWING A NEW ROTOR AT THE SUCKER NEXT MONTH . . . . NEVER USED SO MUCH REAR BRAKE ON ANY BIKE IN MY LIFE, MIGHT HAVE TO STOP BEING A LAZY BASTARD AND DROP THE FRONT ANCHOR A BIT HARDER IN FUTURE . . . . OTHER THAN THAT MINOR ISSUE, AND A WHOLE MESS OF ROAD GRIME SHIT THAT I HAVEN'T CLEANED IN TWO MONTHS, THE PENIS MOBILE IS STILL GOING STRONG AT WELL INTO THE 43,000 KLM MARK . . . . AS FOR THE IDIOT WITH THE RAT FACE, HE'S DOING OKAY HEADING TOWARD THE 52 YEAR MARK . . . . LATER FOLKS.