JAPAN "DON'T RAIN ON MY PARADE" . . . . THE PRINCES OF POST PUNK POUTING, PISSING PROUDLY UPON THE BABS CLASSIC . . . . PRIOR TO MESSRS SYLVIAN, KARN ET AL PICKING UP POLAROIDS AND AN EXTREME EASTERN FETISH . . . . PREDATING THE L.A HAIR BAND SCHTICK BY SIX YEARS !!!!

This rendition of the Streisand classic was released in 1978, punk was everywhere and the big hair scene was dying in the arse as everybody from the Stones to ELO starting cropping their lockes and trying to adopt the new image . . . . from this period sprang Japan, led by lead vocalist and super androgynous frontman, David Sylvian. In combo with the now sadly deceased Mick Karn, Richard Barbieri and a bloke whose name I can never fucking remember, they put out this sneering, glam punk hybrid pisstake . . . .

By 1981 they had changed their image completely, gone were the male rock slut, dirtbag, heroin chic looks of '78, in there place, immaculate suits and heavy face powder along with synth dominant, eastern influenced music . . . . 'Gentlemen Take Polaroids' was a great album and shaped their future as well as making a guilded cage for both the 'most beautiful man in rock', as Sylvian was often referred to as, along with the rest of the band . . . . but this fucking brilliant take on Miss Streisand's hit from some years previous is still the song that does it for me, glam with a real and tangible 'fuck off' attitude, it caught the feel of the times perfectly, hair today, long gone tomorrow.

THE ORIGINAL "HIPPY KILLER" BY KUTTY NOTEBOOM . . . . ONE OF THOSE BIKES I NEVER GET TIRED OF STARING AT . . . . LONG, LEAN AND PERFECTLY SUITED TO REDUCING THE TREE HUGGER NUMBERS . . . . THIS SILENT FOOTAGE [DAMN SHAME] IS A RIPPER 360 DEGREE WALK AROUND OF A DIGGER I REALLY DIG.

IT'S A FUNNY THING, FOR ALL THE BAD MOUTHING THAT SKIRTSTERS COP, THEY'VE SURE HAD THEIR SHARE OF TOP RATING CUSTOM ACTION OVER THE LAST FORTY YEARS . . . . THE HIPPY KILLER IS JUST ONE IN A LONG LINE OF SWEET AS A NUT RIDES BASED ON THE 'ENTRY LEVEL', 'GIRLS BIKE', 'BIKE YOU GET BEFORE YOU BUY A BIG TWIN' HARLEY . . . . YOU GO BACK THROUGH OLD MAGS AND PHOTOS AND THE SHEER WEIGHT OF NUMBERS OF SHOTS FEATURING THE LITTLEST V-TWIN FROM THE BAR AND SHEILD STABLES IN SPLENDIDLY CHOPPED GLORY IS OUT OF KILTER WITH THEIR SO CALLED STATION IN LIFE . . . .

I ALSO FIND IT INTERESTING THAT ON CHOPPERDAVE'S BLOG POLL ON WHICH MOTOR IS MOST FAVOURED TO BASE A CHOPPER ON, INCLUDING ALL OF HARLEY'S CONFIGURATIONS, BRITS, JAPS ETC, GUESS WHICH ONE IS LEADING THE PACK . . . . I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT, IT'S NOT KNUCKLES, PANS, SHOVELS, FLATHEADS, EVOS, JAPPAS OR POMMIES . . . . SPOT ON, THE EENIE, WEENIE, QUAD CAM ROCKET KNOWN AS THE SPORTSTER, IT SEEMS THAT THE REALITY OF THE SITUATION AIN'T ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE BULLSHIT, MACHO, NEEDLEDICK MYTH.

ONE LOOK AT THE KILLER OF HIPPIES TELLS YOU THAT THE BRILLIANCE OF H-D's UNIT CONSTRUCTION MINI MAULER IS MORE THAN JUST ENGINEERING GENIUS, IT'S A FUCKING GORGEOUS LOOKIN BIT OF KIT . . . . AND ACCORDING TO ALL THOSE CASTING THEIR VOTES ON THE POLL, THERE IS MORE THAN JUST A FEW WHO FEEL THE SAME WAY . . . .



NO MATTER, YOU CAN'T HELP FOLK FROM LEAPING TO ILL INFORMED DELUSIONS ON ALL MANNER OF SHIT IN LIFE . . . . SOMETIMES A LITTLE KNOWLEDGE IS JUST ENOUGH TO COMPLETELY FUCK YOUR OWN SHIT UP . . . . JUST LIKE TUNNEL VISION CAN PRECLUDE YOU FROM THE BEAUTY OF THE BIGGER, BROADER AND BETTER PICTURE . . . . GO THE SPORTY . . . . THE NAME SAYS IT ALL . . . . SPORTAY OLE !!!!

"212 094" FROM 'GHMC4746' ON POOTUBE . . . . WHOEVER YOU ARE, THAT IS ONE SWEET SCOOT . . . . A REAL NO FUSS, NO FRILLS SPORTY 'CHOCKER/BRACKER' . . . . OR SHOULD THAT BE 'TROBBER'. . . . WHATEVER IT IS, IT'S A SUPER COOL, COMPLETELY HONEST JOB OF BIKE BUILDING . . . . NOTHIN OTHER THAN WHAT'S NEEDED TO DO THE JOB.

I love the feeling that wells up inside me when confronted with something like this, a bike so perfect for what it is that anything you might choose to alter would be verging on sacrilegious and offensive to the bloke, or chick, who knocked the thing out in the first place . . . . the wee sporty in the video fully rekindles the special rush I used to get as a young kid whenever a cool bike or car came into view, the full-on 'golly gosh, look at that thing dad' kinda reaction, the fuzzy, tingly feeling when you'd say to yourself 'one day when I grow up I'm gonna have one of them' . . . . remember those moments ????



Well, I'm all growed up now dad and I still get the same old feeling, but only nearly everytime, even though I've had a decent smattering of my own cool rides over the last three plus decades, whenever I notice somebody else's cool lookin toy that familiar old fuzzy shit starts happenin all over again, exactly as it did when I was complete anklebiter . . . . and frankly Mr Shankley, I couldn't be more fucking stoked . . . . once it stops happenin, perhaps that's when it's time to put me in the ground, skip the old peoples home, just take me out there and then. Without the stimulation and the wonderful vibes that course through my veins as a result of this type of encounter, there just ain't too much more that can fill the void.

SLAPBACKS @ "HOTROD HAYRIDE" 2011 . . . . A RAMPAGING GANG OF POMMY SOCIOPATHS [IN A NICE WAY] GETTING TOGETHER AND WHOOPING IT UP AT ONE OF THEIR ANNUAL SHEBANGS . . . . COOL BIKES, COOL CARS, COOL DC3's, COOL BEERS, COOL BILLY CARTS AND COOL TUNES . . . . IT'S THE SAME COOL SHIT ALL OVER THE WORLD . . . . AND IT'S ALL FUCKIN COOL !!!!

A BUNCH OF THE GUYS WHO RUN BLOGS THAT A LOT OF US FOLLOW ARE SOME OF THE CREW RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS CAPER AND OTHERS LIKE IT GROWING IN POPULARITY IN THE UK . . . . AND THIS STUFF IS GAINING POPULAR ACCEPTANCE THE WORLD OVER AND NO MATTER HOW SOME FEEL ABOUT THIS SURGE IN PUBLIC INTEREST, I SAY IT'S A NEAT THING . . . . JUST BE GROOVY, DON'T BE A DICK !!!

EVERYONE'S ENTITLED TO JUMP ON THE BANDWAGON AND RELISH IN THE SHIT THAT HAS BEEN PART OF MANY OF OUR LIVES FOREVER, IT'S THE NATURE OF THINGS, AND IN MY OPINION, THE MORE THE MERRIER, COME ON DOWN . . . . IT'S ONLY WHEN YOU TURN UP ARMED WITH BULLSHIT ATTITUDE, OFF THE RACK 'COOL' AND A LACK OF RESPECT THAT YOU'RE GONNA END UP IN THE POO.

SO GET OUT AND GET INTO IT, IF YOU DIG IT AND WANNA BE PART OF IT, RIGHT ON, BUT PLEASE . . . . REMEMBER YOUR MANNERS . . . . BE NICE.

"SUNDAY MORNING COMING DOWN" KRIS KRISTOFFERSON . . . . MAYBE THIS IS THE SORT SONG YOU GROW INTO MORE AND MORE THE OLDER YOU BECOME . . . . MAYBE IT'S LYRICAL CONTENT BECOMES EVEN MORE PERTINENT WHEN YOUR BACK CATALOGUE OF FAILURES AND FUCK-UPS REACHES A CERTAIN CRITICAL MASS . . . . MAYBE IT'S JUST ONE OF THE GREATEST SONGS EVER WRITTEN.

The guy's a bloody legend, it's almost an understatement given how everyone and everything becomes a legend so easily these days . . . . he's not a legend because he's a Rhodes Scholar, he's not a legend because he's spent a fair chunk of his life hangin out with his equally legendary and well documented counterparts, not because he served as an officer in the military nor because he's acted in some fairly credible film roles . . . . I reckon the man's a legend because he has written songs about the enduring and innate universality of the human condition, and lots of em, but for me, 'Sunday Morning Coming Down' takes the metaphorical cake . . . . if you don't get it, maybe you just need to experience a bit more of life's pain, and I ain't talkin broken bones . . . . keep em rollin, shiny side up.

"MAD MAX" KZ1000 . . . . FIRSTLY, DISREGARD THE U.S.A RELEASE VERSION AND ITS LIMPDICK, DUBBED AMERICAN ACCENTS [NO OFFENCE], IT SUCKED BUCKETLOADS OF ARSE . . . . SEE THE GENUINE 'STRINE' VERSION, IT'S THE BOMB . . . . SECONDLY, THERE IS SO MUCH BULLSHIT MYTH SPOKEN ABOUT THE FLICK, 'GOOSE' WOULD BE LAUGHIN HIS DEEP FRIED FACE OFF !!!!

THIS POST IS TO ADDRESS ONE OF THE MANY BONES OF CONTENTION THAT STILL SURROUNDS THE PRODUCTION OF THE MOST SIGNIFICANT ROAD MOVIE OF MODERN TIME. YES, IT'S A TAD JINGOISTIC, BUT "MAD MAX" IN ITS ORIGINAL, UNADULTERATED, NON DUBBED FORM IS A FUCKING BONA FIDE FIRST FOR COUNTLESS REASONS, I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BOTHER WITH 'PROOF' - IT JUST IS, NO ARGUMENTS ACCEPTED . . . .

One of my closest mates, fellow skater and the bass player in my first band, Dale 'The Rat' Stevens, is the nephew of Grant Page, head stunt dude and Mel's 'double' in Mad Max, in fact he shot all his scenes with a busted leg sustained in a bike get off on the way to the set . . . . and the guy who gets smacked in the head by his bike on the bridge didn't die either, contrary to popular urban myth, he was, however, a legit member of a semi outlaw mob called the Vigilantes who made up most of the Toecutter's crew . . . . anyhow, we got to meet Grant on our first trip Sydney and asked all the idiot questions young blokes do when in the company of greatness . . . . and full of too much booze !!!



The scene I've nailed to the wall here is the one showing the clocks on Goose's Z1000 as he winds it on leading up to the brake shitting itself and seizing thanks to Johnny 'The Boy' and his act of sabotage . . . . the tacho is showing around the 8,000 to 8,500 mark and the speedo is hovering around the 160 klm/hr zone . . . . this has caused a lot of armchair critics to suggest the film was sped up or otherwise faked, this is total bullshit, as Grant said, the segment of film, shot while the cameraman was lashed to the rider with no helmet, was simply done with the bike in fourth gear, [it may have been third but I don't think so] not fifth, hence the greatly increased tacho reading and the sound of the bike screaming its top end off . . . . Page, as the stunt co-ordinator and super keen rider himself took it all into account and whoever did the riding nailed it, no speeding up film, no phony clocks, no bollocks, no bullshit, end of story . . . . another wrap, another legend Mad Max scene in the can.

So, there you have it, take it to the bank folks, thems is the facts . . . . any doubters, like the guys I was having a fairly animated discussion with last night at dinner, go and do some research yourself, it'll be out there somewhere . . . . the truth always is . . . . and while you're out there chasing that down, go and check out the 'real' version of the film . . . . kill two geese with one stone.

BOYLE CUSTOM MOTORCYCLES AIR CLEANER . . . . THE ALL NEW 'THINNER PINNER' IS A REAL FERKIN GRINNER . . . . MINE ARRIVED IN THE MAIL YESTERDAY AND IT'S THE AIRSHIZZLE . . . . DAMN, I LOVE ALLOY THAT HAS THE AURA ONLY HANDS ON PRODUCTION CAN IMPART !!!!

MOST OF YOU HARDCORES AND INDUSTRY TYPES ARE WELL AWARE OF KIM FROM THE 'BOYLE CUSTOM MOTORCYCLES' OPERATION, I'M HERE TO TELL THOSE WHO MIGHT NOT HAVE KNOWLEDGE OF HIM OR WHAT HE DOES THAT THE GUY AND HIS PRODUCTS ARE THE DUCK'S FUCKING NUTS . . . .

From the moment I picked up Project Shoveller, my '74 FXE, I knew I was going to be putting one of Kim's ultra clean Pinner aircleaner units on its Super E, I'm not really into anything with too much fancy detail and as soon as I saw one I knew what I wanted . . . . by the time I got onto him they were sold out but he said he had some more on the way just in a thinner section, I said sweet and waited until the newbie models rolled off the line.

I ordered the 'tumbled' finish version as I have always had a fixation thang for the look of magnesium performance parts from the 50's, 60's and 70's. Whether it's the centres of old Minilite and Halibrand wheels, Webco and Magnussen bike components, whatever, that dull, unpolished appearance just cranks my handle . . . . plus, if you change your mind you can always shiny the thing up.

The entire assembly is top shelf, finish and detail are both excellent, no scars, imperfections anywhere, the inner surfaces of the body where the vortex inducing cone sits is similarly a real confirmation of Kim's attention to detail, beautifully precise machining is evident throughout this area, even though it's never visible, [as is the inner side of the cover] it's there for a purpose and cutting corners ain't an option. Even the weld that joins the mesh cage together that holds the mini Uni Filter element in place is beautifully executed, and it's also perfectly concentric where so many similar cages are anything but.

Each unit comes complete with mounting fasteners and the option for either a traditional flathead screw or a hex head bolt to secure the outer cover to the main body, your choice completely.

There are so many good guys out there doing their own little trip when it comes to aftermarket parts, from legitimate go fast goodies, run of the mill mechanical pieces or strictly dress up stuff, Kim Boyle at B.C.M is another one of this merry band of brothers . . . . visit his blog and check out the kit he's knocking out . . . . whatever you do, you don't have to go to the same old sources for your parts, you shouldn't go to the same old sources . . . . if you give a fuck and if you want stuff that reeks of the makers hand, go to the folk like Kim, support the guys who care, the blokes who want the best out of themselves and won't cut corners, so you get the best there is . . . . thanks BCM, love your work !!!!

EMINEM "MY NAME IS" 1999 . . . . AFTER THE DISASTROUSLY FAILED WHITE BOY RAPPER EXPERIMENT THAT WAS VANILLA ICE, WHO'D HAVE THUNKED A WHITE BOY PUNK FROM MOTORTOWN WOULD NOT ONLY SUCCEED, BUT CHANGE THE GENRE AND IT'S LANDSCAPE . . . . SUCH WAS THE IMPACT OF ONE MARSHALL MATHERS.

1999, a Saturday arvo, hungover, super bleary and sitting in my then wife's Civic as she drove us to sushi for a late get the fuck better feed of sashimi and avocado salmon ships, Triple J, one of the world's greatest alternate radio stations back then, buzzin in the background . . . . then on it comes . . . . "hi, waaa, my name is, waaa, my name, vvttt vvttt, Slim Shady . . . . " I was sold, lock, stock and two throbbing temples, I wasn't sure if whoever it was making this rap-racket was black, white or a little green man from Planet Get the Fuck Outta Town, but this was the dope, this was pure China White, raw Golden Brown, this was the shit a guy like me can O.D on forever, it fucked with my cerebral cortex like few tunes ever have . . . .

To steal one of Mr Kanno's lines, dis was Eminem, aka 'Slim Shady', real name, Marshall Mathers, this was the Thin White Duke of the modern musical era, not, like his prat, pretender predecessor Ice Ice Baby, the Great White Hype, rather the whiter than white Hyper Real Deal right from the start . . . . even my ex picked the effect it had on me, she simply said, "you like this, don't you ?" . . . . fuck yeah I like it !!!!! The hangover cleared instantly, I had been moved. He had gone beyond what the Beasties had been putting down and taken it to a new, intergalactic level.



The rest, as you all know, is history, the personal, behind the scenes shit doesn't matter a fuck, the reality is that Slim Shady, in cahoots with rap/hip hop Godfather and ultra legend, Dr Dre, acting as producer and spiritual adviser, went on to become the white dude who influenced the way even the 'Brothers' delivered their spiels . . . . he changed patterns, timing, phrasing, the entire fucking caper was tweaked by this one kid from the arse end of Detroit, almost like Miles Davis had done with Jazz and the Be Bop bomb fifty years prior.

The haters and the clowns living in denial of his significance in popular music can stick it up their arses, you don't have to like it, just like I think a lot of Led Zep, Sabbath and Deep Purple is pretty dull, monotonous drivel, but you can't deny them, or Eminem, his due for what he brought to the table over a decade ago . . . . nobody saw it comin, except Dre, and by the time they did it was all over bar the copying . . . . so, won't you please stand up, please stand up, for the Real Slim Shady.

DEADBOLT "TRUCK DRIVIN SOB" ESPECIALLY FOR THOSE WELL KNOWN INTERNATIONAL TRUCKERS FROM "DICE" MAGAZINE . . . . I'D SO WANTED TO FIND A LIVE VID OF THIS BUT COULDN'T SEEM TO JAG IT . . . . OH WELL, FUCK IT, THIS WILL HAVE TO SUFFICE . . . . STRAIGHT OUTTA AUSTIN BY TRUCK !!!!

Isn't it weird that that the Lone Star State has ejaculated such a depth of not only great blues, R+B and rock bands into the world's musical womb but a long and illustrious list of sick, twisted, demented, alternate acts . . . . At the Drive In, Buttholes, Deadbolt to name but three as I sit here in a Barolo induced stupor . . . . must be a reaction to . . . . no, fuck it . . . . let's not get political, just climb on up into the cab and dig what to me is the archetypal truckers ode . . . . Dean and Matt, keep on truckin !!!

"BASTARDIZED VOLUME 2 Trailer" BY 'BASTARDIZEDMOVIE' . . . . AGAIN, RIPPED STRAIGHT FROM 'SPEEDBOYS' BLOG . . . . THIS SHIT IS JUST SUPER REAL, NO PRETENSION, NO PHONY STUFF AT ALL . . . . SIMPLY A BUNCH OF COOL SCOOTS AND CARS GETTIN LEFTY LOOSEY . . . . THIS KINDA CAPER DEFINITELY GIVES ME THE FULL HORN !!!!

I would be fully stoked and eternally grateful if anyone can steer me towards being able to procure a copy of these two choppaliscious 'fillums', as one of my teachers at school used to say, I've been to the Los Boulavardos blog and can't draw a bead on it . . . . both these schweet shortarse teaser/trailers are the legit shit for me, bikes, rods, skaties, nasty R+R and a real integrity to it, no cheesy 'pose' shots, no faux heroics, just a bunch of loonies smokin it up and having a gay old time . . . . just as it should be !!!!

Anyway, pump up the volume, focus the old eyeballs and enjoy the wonderful world of all things cool with "Bastaradized Volumes I and 2" teasers . . . . I'm well enough teased to the point of explosion from the groin region . . . . ooh baby, baby . . . . ooh baby, baby !!!!

"BASTARDIZED VOLUME 1 TEASER" . . . . I JUST, LIKE FIVE MINUTES AGO, DISCOVERED THIS FULL ON RAGIN, ACTION CRANKIN, TYRE SMOKIN, RUBBER CHUNK CHOKIN, MUTHAFUCKIN STROKIN TRAILER ON THE "SPEEDBOYS" BLOG . . . . BLOODY FANTASTIC FINDING SHIT I AIN'T NEVER SEEN BEFORE . . . . CHEERS SPEEDY LADS !!!!

I HAVE A SNEAKING SUSPICION IT WAS PUT TOGETHER BY SWEDEN'S [THOSE DAMN SWEDES AGAIN !!!] 'LOS BOULAVARDOS' CREW . . . . THE ACTION'S ALL SWEET AND SO ARE THE FEATURED BIKES AND CUSTOMS . . . . TOTALLY STREET LEVEL COOL !!!!



**** I'LL POST THE NEXT ONE IMMEDIATELY, INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE, FULLY !!!!

KNOG KNOGuMENTARY - "WENDY HEARTS LEADING DOG" . . . . FOR ANY FOLLOWERS OF C.O.C YOU WILL LIKELY HAVE NOTICED THE 'KNOG' LOGO . . . . IF YOU'RE INTO TREADLIES THEY DO REALLY COOL STUFF FOR YOU AND YOUR BIKE . . . . THEY ALSO DO SHITHOT BAGS AS I'VE DISCOVERED . . . . I'VE ALSO JUST DISCOVERED THIS HILARIOUS PROMO DOCO !!!!

ALTERNATIVE POST TITLE  - "USE YOUR KNOGGIN FOR LONG DISTANCE COGGIN"

THE LAST ISSUE OF 'DICE' FEATURED AN ARTICLE ABOUT "EVERYDAY CARRY" OR EDC IN HIPSTER-SPEAK, YOU KNOW, SHIT YOU ALWAYS HAVE ON YOU OR CARRY WITH YOU ON A RIDE OR A TRIP, BY CALEB OWENS FROM CRO CUSTOMS . . . . CRO WAS ON ABOUT HIS BACKPACK BEING MODERN AND WATERPROOF AS OPPOSED TO ALL THE OLD CANVAS TYPES LIKE MY FRAYED AND THRASHED SURPLUS JIGGER I'VE HAD SINCE IT WASN'T FRAYED AND THRASHED IN THE DISTANT EARLY 90's.

Time to get me a new one and this time I started lookin around for something that was bigger, better, modern without being poncy and, above all, waterproof . . . . remember, I'm just talkin a shoulder type messenger satchel type thing, not a full blown back pack number, roomy enough to take a bunch of shit to escape quickly for three days but in a simple, over the shoulder configuration.



Having looked at many different brands from all over the interwebnetworldthingy, I thought I'd take a quick perve at the Knog site, low and behold, there it was, the very thing, in plain khaki green, mulitple pockets, big main compartments and waterproof . . . . I ordered one on the spot, that was on Monday night at half past pretty fucking late . . . . late morning on Wednesday the bloody thing arrives on the doorstep, [brilliant service Knoggers] and it's everything I had hoped for and more !!!

Super duty hardware for a start, buckles that won't break or fall off, heavy duty zippers, nice wide, fully adjustable strap, some sorta tripple tough new age outer fabric with fully waterproof inner lining, lots of pockets and compartments, really well finished in regards to the stitching and so forth, excellent capacity for all I need to throw in it . . . . good to fucking go I say !!!

It's a big leap for a bloke like me who generally never buys anything that looks contemporary or in any remote way 'fashionable', but, I'm being practical and now I'm actually looking forward to the next time I'm halfway between here and nowhere and getting soaked . . . . at least I know my spare pair of jocks, socks and jeans will be dry as a nun's proverbial in my big, green, wonderfully waterproof "Pig Dog" Knog, go anywhere satchel . . . . be like Wendy, get it on with a Knog !!! 

"THE CHINESE MOTORCYCLE CLUB OF DENMARK" . . . . READING A POST FROM GUY AT 'GKM' THE OTHER DAY PROMPTED ME ONTO THIS . . . . WE BITCH AND MOAN ABOUT THE HASSLES WE HAVE IN OZ, THE STATES, ENGLAND, CANADA, SWEDEN ETC WHEN IT COMES TO LAWS AND THE FILTH . . . . TRY LIVING IN DENMARK AND WANTING TO HAVE YOUR IDEAL SCOOT . . . . GOOD LUCK ON THAT ONE PAL !!!!

I've never seen so many Chinese bikes in one place in my life, and I must admit to having a right old chuckle about the concept amd the video initially . . . . however . . . . a majority of these folks would love to be ridin Hoggly's or Trumpy's, even a big ol' JapaHarley, but they can't . . . . not unless they want to cough up 180% import duty on new bikes, not to mention they can't even register them if they haven't passed the Euro specific, hard as fucking nails, emissions test . . . . oh, did I mention the insane fines and penalties aimed specifically at the motorcycle community ???

There's quite a decent number of non Chinese bikes in this footage but check out some more the vids on "PeteDeuxWheels" PooTube channel and you'll see what I mean . . . . whatever, here's to the Chinese Motorcycle Club of Denmark, gettin out there and on it, despite the antagonistic legislative and governmental barriers in their way . . . . next time we're havin a whinge about how tough we've got it, let's spare a thought for a majority of fellow riders in Denmark . . . . shit could be worse !!!

"2011 CHRR SATURDAY NIGHT CACKLEFEST" BY 'NITROAMERICA' . . . . THERE AIN'T NOTHIN TOUGHER OR MORE HORN INDUCING THAN A BUNCH OF NITRO SLURPIN, OLD SCHOOL F.E.D's IN A DRIVE BY . . . . YES, THINGS ARE A LITTLE FASTER THESE DAYS BUT THESE THINGS ARE THE SHIT . . . . THE HONEST AND GENUINE EXTENSION OF THE HOT ROD PHILOSOPHY OF THE TIME.

IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT BEING FAST . . . . IT'S HOW YOU GET THERE !!!!

From a time before 'politically correct' do gooders and bullshit litigation and legislation brought the whole shebang to a sterilised, sanitised, pasteurised and commercialised halt . . . . hemi loads of real style, from the paint, the motors, the noise, wire wheels up front, not so much as a tie down across the blower, built in backyard garages by punks high on nitro lookin for a potentially lethal dose of 'fucking fast' straight into the main vein . . . .

Yeah, this shit's for real, in a bland and beige modern world obsessed with the 'next big thing', these monsters and their pilots hold the same fascination and awed respect for me now as they did forty years ago . . . . timeless cool, timeless tough . . . . cackling like Satan on the brown acid . . . . evil mofos one and all !!!!

MINISTRY "JESUS BUILT MY HOTROD" . . . . I POSTED THIS ONCE BEFORE, PRIOR TO DISCOVERING THE ART OF POSTING COMPLETE VIDS . . . . AS I'M OFF FOR A QUICK 300 klm SPRINT ON THE 'PURPLE PENIS' TO GET ON IT WITH MY BEST MATE MENTIONED IN THE ORIGINAL POST, THOUGHT I'D THROW IT UP ONE MORE TIME . . . . IT'S A BAD BOTTOM TUNE MAN !!!

I GUESS ROCK + ROLL HAS ALWAYS BEEN BEST SERVED LOUD, LEWD, HOT, SWEATY, DIRTY AND FLAT OUT . . . . THEREBY, THIS TUNE HAS BEEN AN ARSE KICKER SINCE IT WAS RELEASED TWENTY ODD YEARS AGO . . . . DRIVING, FUZZED OUT GUITARS, THE VOCALS OF A MOONSHINE RUNNER CHEWIN ON TOBACCO AND SWIGGIN WHISKEY, DRUMS AND BASS GOIN ROUND AND ROUND LIKE THE BOTTOM END IN SATAN'S MOPAR . . . . WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT FROM A MUSICAL MEDIUM THAT'S GENERALLY RESTRICTED TO THREE CHORDS . . . . ????

"HELL'S YEAGER" . . . . I LOVE IT WHEN CHICKS TAKE CHARGE . . . . WE'RE GONNA THROW DOWN WITH THE REAL SCENSTERS . . . . INCISIVE MOMENTS IN SCENE OBSERVATION PART 43a . . . . I DON'T IMAGINE I'VE GOT TOO MANY H.O.G MEMEBERS READING THIS BLOG, BUT, FOR THOSE WHO DO . . . . THIS ONE'S ESPECIALLY FOR YOU . . . . AND WES AND LADY LIMP, BECAUSE THEY CRACK ME UP !!!!

"SAME OLD SCENE" ROXY MUSIC . . . . DO I DETECT A THEME HERE . . . . ???? NO, NEVER, NOT AT ALL . . . . OH, ALRIGHT THEN, IT'S A BUST . . . . GREAT SONG, COOL SCENE, PERIOD CORRECT SMOKING AS WELL.

FROM THE OLD AND INSIGHTFULLY ACERBIC FILES . . . . IS THIS YOUR SCENE . . . . COULD THIS BE YOUR SCENE . . . . SHOULD THIS BE YOUR SCENE . . . . DON'T YOU FIND IT INCREDIBLY FUCKING BORING HAVING SUCH A MYOPIC VIEW OF THE SAME SCENE . . . . I LIKE BIKES, THAT'S MY SCENE.

SOME MORE 'SCENES' TO PONDER . . . . THE 'INCOMMUNICADO SCENE', THE 'MY SHIT DON'T STINK SCENE', THE 'I WAS HERE BEFORE YOU SCENE', THE 'CHOPPER CLUB EXCLUSIVE SCENE', THE 'NEVER SELL OUT UNLESS IT'S TEE SHIRTS SCENE', THE 'TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL SCENE', THE 'I'VE SEEN YOUR SCENE, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN SCENE' . . . . THE 'COME ON INVENT YOUR OWN SCENE SCENE' . . . . AND LASTLY, THE 'FUCK, I'M JUST ALL SCENED OUT SCENE' . . . .



YOU SEE, I'M FROM THE 'EVEN THOUGH I LOVE CHOPS ETC, I DIG MOTORCYCLES AND PEOPLE WHO ARE FUCKING HONESTLY INTO THE THINGS SCENE' . . . . I'M ALSO QUITE PARTIAL TO THE GOOD OLD 'SEE THE JOY IN MOST OTHER PEOPLE'S SCENE SCENE' . . . . KNOW WOT I MEAN ? I'D HATE TO CAUSE A SCENE . . . HA !!!

AND NOW, AFTER A 'NICE, LONG DAY ON THE BIKE SCENE' I'M FULLY UP FOR SOME SERIOUS ZEDS SCENE . . . . SWEET SCENES EVERYBODY

QUOTE OF THE DAY, "BE SEEN, BUY A SCENE" JOHN CONFUCIUS, SCENE STEALER.

BRMC "WHATEVER HAPPENED TO MY ROCK+ROLL" . . . . LAST ONE FOR THE DAY, ON THE BLUDGE TOMORROW, SERIOUS SADDLE TIME, RAIN, HAIL OR SHINE . . . . ONE OF THE BEST GENUINE ROCK BANDS OF THE LAST DECADE FOR ME . . . . AND WHAT THE FUCK HAS HAPPENED TO ROCK + ROLL ???? I KNOW IT'S ONLY R + R BUT I LIKE IT, LIKE IT, YES I DO !!!!

"MOONEYES AT SILVERSTONE 1963" FROM 'TIMETRAVELDVDS' ON POOTUBE . . . . CLASSIC SEARCHING MISSION YIELDS DOUBLE BONUS RESULTS . . . . I WAS DESPERATE TO GET ONTO SOME PERIOD FOOTAGE OF EX VINCENT WORKS RIDER GEORGE BROWN ONBOARD THE SUPERCHARGED "SUPER NERO" VINNIE . . . . WHICH IS APPARENTLY FUCKING NIGH ON IMPOSSIBLE TO ACHIEVE . . . . THEN, BANG !!! I HIT THE DOUBLE WHAMMY, CHECK THIS SHIT OUT !!!!

GEORGE BROWN WAS A POM WHO RODE, TESTED AND RACED FOR VINCENT UNTIL THE STEVENAGE MARQUE FINALLY FOLDED IN 1955, YOU CAN ONLY IMAGINE THE ERA HE WAS PART OF, HE HAD PARTS AND MOTORS BY THE BARROW LOAD AT HIS DISPOSAL . . . . AFTER THE GATES WERE CLOSED HE BECAME OBSESSIVE IN HIS PURSUIT OF QUARTER MILE GLORY WITH THE VINCENT 1000cc TWIN, INITIALLY WITH THE NORMALLY ASPIRATED "NERO" FOLLOWED BY THE BLOWN "SUPER NERO" VERSION . . . .

Ultimately it became the fastest motorbike in the world in both top end speed and quarter mile times for a while, even against serious opposition from the States, remember, this was still the early/mid sixties . . . . I've only ever read about it and seen photos, never any action footage, I had thought it wouldn't be too difficult to track some down . . . . incorrectomundo . . . . seems like fuck all people were pointing the Super 8 at old George back in the day, whatever the reason, there wasn't a buch of stuff out there to choose from . . . .



Then, about two hours ago I lucked onto this brilliant period piece complete with some decent narration and, at no extra charge, some excellent action shots of Dean Moon's, Dante Duce piloted dragster at Britain's legendary 'Silverstone' strip in 1963 . . . . also squeezing themselves into frame are some of the U.K's best 1/4 milers, and some novelty value courtesy of a pair of Ford Anglias that appear to be nudging at least 45mph as they disappear in agonising tardiness down the track.

So, after initially being pissed off and feeling totally bummed, I now find myself totally cock a hoop with my unearthing of this mega bit of speed history . . . . the amazing George Brown on the super charged "Super Nero" Vinnie and the Mooneyes dragster, all in the one film, giddy up motherfucker, time's a'wastin . . . .

INSIDE THE CAVE OF THE GREYBEARD OF BROOMFIELD . . . . DEEP INSIDE THIS TOP SECRET LOCATION COMES THESE ALMOST NEVER BEFORE SEEN PICTURES OF THE MECHANICAL MYSTIC AT WORK . . . . CONJURING FLAME FROM ANCIENT WEAPONRY, SURROUNDED BY STRANGE, TWO WHEELED MACHINES . . . . PONDERING THE VERY FUTURE OF LIFE AS WE KNOW IT . . . . ALL WHILE GETTING DOWN TO MACHINE GUN FELLATIO AND THEIR SWEET LITTLE DITTY, "MUTHA FUCKA ON A MOTORCYCLE".

This classified visual document, filmed covertly by arch underground uber operative and international man of mystery, code name "BigStinkyTights",  has now been released to the public in a secret deal between the U.S and Australian governments . . . . so now for almost the first, nearly exclusive time, the team at WhitelinePsycho makes available to you this thought provoking piece of photojournalistic significance based on one man's mission of madness . . . . coincidentally, from very nearby the onetime earthly home of Mork from Ork, as he measures, cogitates, meditates and contemplates the possible outcome for his next weapon of mass destruction . . . .



On a more serious note, the chief Shamrocker himself is featured in various studious poses in this series of stills composed by BigStinkyTights, a cool insight into Irish Rich's den of mechanial mayhem and its legendary output of fine quality sickles . . . . the yellow/brown transparent screen is actually a deadly force field, left behind by Mork, prior to his cocaine fuelled return to Planet Ork, this alone has been able to keep lurkers and undesirable G Men types at bay for thirty years . . . .   but it wasn't enough to repel the likes of BigStinkyTights, great result mate, see you when you're released . . . . hopefully. 

"BORN FREE 3 BIKE SHOW" BY 'CLAIRSKATESALOT' ON POOTUBE . . . . SKATER CHICK CLAIR STITCHED THIS NEAT LITTLE POSTCARD TOGETHER OF LAST YEAR'S SHINDIG . . . . PERFECTLY CAPTURING THE VIBE AND THE MOOD OF WHAT HAS SEEMED TO ME TO BE THE BEST LITTLE GIG OF ITS KIND ANYWHERE . . . . THE BIKES, THE PEOPLE AND THE PLACE, AND #4 IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER . . . . BOOKING MY FLIGHT TODAY, BF4, HERE I COME !!!

THIS YEAR IT'S AT THE SAME LOCATION AND HOPEFULLY THE SUPER RELAXED VIBE AND FEEL OF THE THING WILL BE JUST AS COOL AS NUMBER 3 ONLY BIGGER AND BETTERER . . . . ALL THE CREW I KNOW WHO HAVE BEEN IN THE PAST TELL ME IT'S THE BEST THING UNDER THE SUN IF YOU'RE INTO BIKES AND THE FOLK WHO RIDE EM . . . . I'M ONLY GONNA HAVE A FOUR DAY WINDOW BUT I'M GONNA BE MILKING IT FOR ALL IT'S WORTH !!!



I'm also hoping to be able to say gidday to a lot of folk I've been hooking up with on the interblog anf netwebthingy over the last few years . . . . this love of old bikes burns deep inside my soul and has done for decades and it's gonna be a real highpoint for me, feelin like a nine year old again, and that's what this madness has always done for me . . . . maybe it's why I've never 'grown up', maybe that's why I've never had the 'midlife crisis' drama . . . .

Like a lot of you out there, never losing touch with the things you were moved by as a kid has turned out to be the secret, the key to living life on your own terms so as to never have to surrender the shit that is the centre of all you ever really wanted to be around . . . . ah, whatever, I'm just stoked it is what it is, I was never irresponsible or lazy, I was just never prepared to abandon the things that I held central in my world so I could fit into somebody else's . . . . as they, "Hold Fast", be true to yourself and the rest will follow. Peace.

R.I.P ROBIN GIBB, NOW IT'S JUST THE 'BEE GEE' AS GIBB BROTHER BAZ STANDS ALONE . . . . IT WAS ROBIN'S VIBRATO VOCALS THAT GAVE THE EARLY BEE GEES RECORDINGS THAT EXTRA SPECIAL SOUND . . . . AND IN SO DOING GAVE THE WORLD SOME TRULY ENDURING CLASSICS . . . . "MASSACHUSETTS" THE BEE GEES.

"79 SHOVELHEAD GOOSENECK" I KEPT COMING BACK TO STARE AT THIS ON POOTUBE . . . . JUST POST THE FUCKER I SAID TO MYSELF, SO HERE IT IS . . . . I'VE NEVER BEEN A COMMITTED FAN OF THE GOOSENECK FRAME . . . . UNTIL I WAS CHECKING OUT ONE ON SOMEBODY'S BLOG RECENTLY.

I really dig this sled, long, low and lean, everything sits beautifully on this bike, from front to back, the whole thing is a totally balanced and beautiful ride, love the tire choice, weird how tread patterns can really pick up on the aesthetic theme of a bike and this is a case in point . . . . simplicity of design once more proving a complete winner, the front hub is another feature on this jigger that grabs my attention for reasons I'm not even sure of,  maybe the combination of the rake, the springer and it just seems to float in the middle of it all . . . . whatever it is, this is one fully happenin machine, I'd be absolutely stoked to have this parked in my garage, no doubt about it !!!!



****** Cheers to 'Modella1930' for gettin it up on the 'Tube, sooooo cool scoot man, thanks a lot !!

THE LEMONHEADS "MRS ROBINSON" . . . . EVERYBODY'S FAVOURITE JUNKY, EVAN DANDO AND THE LEMONHEADS BLASTING THROUGH THE OLD 'BORING AND DULLWINKLE' GEM FROM "THE GRADUATE" . . . . LOVE THE WAY THIS VERSION KICKS ALONG, AUSSIE LAD ON DRUMS LEADING FROM THE FRONT . . . . A PERFECT DAY OUTSIDE CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING . . . . HIT THE FROG AND TOAD TIME !!!!!

"JESUS, YOU POST A LOT OF COMMENTS ON A LOT OF BLOGS" . . . . YEAH, I DO . . . . I FOLLOW SHIT THAT TURNS ME ON AND COMMENT AS I WOULD TO A PERSON IN THE FLESH . . . . IF MY COMMENTS PISS OFF THE BLOG OWNERS, PLEASE LET ME KNOW AND I'LL CEASE IMMEDIATELY . . . . OUTSIDE OF THAT , TO SOME OTHER 'COMMENTERS' . . . . "FUCK YOU & THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON" - KING OF THE SUN, YEE HA !!!!

AN OPEN LETTER TO BLOGLAND DWELLERS . . . .

I'M NOT FOLLOWING ALL THOSE ON MY BLOG LIST TO IMPRESS ANYBODY OR ANY OTHER ALTERIOR MOTIVE, I'M DOIN IT FOR MY OWN RUSH AND ENJOYMENT, TO BE PART OF A WORLDWIDE COMMUNITY OF KINDRED SPIRITS SHARING THE SAME PASSIONS, A SIMILAR HEADSPACE AND POINT OF VIEW . . . . ON SUBJECT MATTER THAT'S BEEN A MAJOR FOCUS OF MINE FOR FORTY PLUS YEARS OF MY LIFE !!!

MY FINALLY DECIDING TO ACTIVELY PARTICIPATE IN THE BLOGGING CAPER WAS BASED ON THE ASSUMPTION THAT THIS IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO TAKE THE JOY AND THE THRILL I'VE ALWAYS GOT FROM READING MAGS, WATCHING VIDEOS AND YACKING ABOUT BIKES, CARS, MUSIC, SKATBOARDING, WHATEVER TO A HIGHER LEVEL, OF SHARING MY THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS THAT WAS NEVER PREVIOUSLY POSSIBLE WITH CREW FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD . . . .

MY COMMENTING ON POSTS THAT MY FELLOW BLOGGERS PUT UP IS FOR NO ONE ELSES BENEFIT OTHER THAN LETTING THEM KNOW I'M DIGGIN THEIR WORK AND AM THANKFUL FOR IT AND IN MANY CASES, THE OPPORTUNITY TO LEARN THINGS I NEVER KNEW . . . . I'M ALSO SUPPORTING MANY OF THEM BY REGULARLY BUYING ANYTHING FROM TEES TO PARTS, NEW, SECOND HAND, WHATEVER, PUTTING THEIR STUFF UP ON MY BLOG TO GET IT OUT THERE WITH NO THOUGHT OF RECIPROCITY . . . . IF I RECKON ITS COOL I'LL SPREAD THE WORD, FREE OF FUCKING CHARGE !!!

IT'S OF NO 'POSE' VALUE TO ME WHATSOEVER, I COULDN'T GIVE A FUCK IF SOME ARE PUT OFF BY MY HEARTFELT COMMENTS, TRY GROWING A PAIR AND PUTTING YOUR SHIT OUT THERE TOO FOR THE WORLD TO SEE, VOICE YOUR OPINION IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY . . . . THIS IS WHO I AM AND HAVE BEEN SINCE I WAS A KID, IF I LIKE SOMETHING, I'M NOT TOO PROUD TO TELL THE PERSON THAT'S HOW I'M FEELIN, NONE OF THIS 'TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL', DON'T SAY A THING BULLSHIT, FUCK THAT !!!! I'M A PASSIONATE, GREGARIOUS BLOKE BY NATURE.

I'M ONLY TOO HAPPY TO REVEL IN OTHERS TALENTS, LET EM KNOW THAT I'M STOKED ON WHAT THEIR PUTTING OUT, I AIN'T EMBARRASSED TO BE SHARING MY HONEST AND WELL INTENDED THOUGHTS AND SPONTANEOUS REACTIONS WITH CREW WHOSE SHIT TURNS ME ON AND MAKES MY WORLD A BETTER PLACE ON A DAILY BASIS . . . . AND, MOROVER, I'M NOT DOIN IT TO THEN EXPECT A REPLY FROM THEM, THERE ARE PLENTY OF FELLAS AND FILLIES OUT THERE WHO DO, WHICH IS COOL, JUST LIKE IT'S COOL IF THEY CHOOSE NOT TO . . . .



***** AS I SAID EARLIER, TO ALL THE BRILLINAT BLOGS I FOLLOW, IF ANY OF YOU WISH THAT I STOP POSTING COMMENTS, PLEASE, JUST LET ME KNOW AND I'LL CEASE AND DESIST FORTHWITH, I'LL STILL REMAIN A LOYAL AND KEEN FOLLOWER AND WILL RESPECT YOUR DECISION . . . . LASTLY, A SINCERE THANKS TO ALL OF THE SAME DUDES AND DUDETTES WHOSE BLOGS I VISIT EVERY DAY, YOU REALLY DO BRIGHTEN MY WORLD . . . . LOVE YOUR COLLECTIVE WORK, BLOG ON PEEPS !!!!

1963 TRIUMPH TR6SC RESTO FROM HELL . . . . I'LL COME CLEAN AND OWN UP TO HAVING SOMETHING OF A 'PURPLE FETISH' BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER . . . . THE FACTORY PAINT JOB ON THIS INSANO TROPHY HAS BEEN MY FAVE COLOUR SCHEME SINCE FIRST SEEING IT ON A BONNIE IN THE LATE EIGHTIES.

I used a purple pen all through high school, I still paint my left thumbnail purple, [the whole hand just takes too much friggin time these days] and the tank on my Skirtster is a two tone purple metallic, as I said, I like the colour . . . . ipso facto, the stock shade turned out of Meriden in the twighlight years of Eddy Turners terrific twins was a real pool of drool for me, dee fucking liscious !!!!

The '63 year models were a benchmark in T120 and TR6 production, not only for the sexy as hell paint options, it was the first year of the unit construction motor, no longer the little parallel twin kept seperate from the gearbox, the whole kit and kaboodle was mated together in one handsome unit, obviously allowing for a more compact bike with a much more pleasing and intergrated appeal.



The American market, led by the legendary Johnson Motors crew, were able to dictate certain styling and performance options that were unique to the lucky bugger Yanks who by this stage were winning on flat tracks, desert races, scrambles events and road racing . . . . from cams and followers, gearing, carbs and jet kits, wide 'bars, guards/fenders, pipe options and more, although a good deal of hot kit was being turned out in the States itself.

The highside pipes fitted with the small peashooter mufflers were one option for the TR6 but if you wanted the full fuck off competition only model you got the bloody gorgeously rawkus, straight through versions as fitted to the unbelievably stunning restoration in this video, the lucky bastard who owns the beast has very tastefully retro fitted a period correct [I hate the term but sometimes it's the only one to utilise] Lucas "Prince of Darkness" lamp that was obviously not part of its original delivery turnout.

I love my sporty and can't wait to get the '74 Shovel on the road and completed but, whenever I see a Trumpy in this kind of nick, not that I'm huge on dead stock pristine resto jobs either, I always get a bit maudlin at having got rid of the three that I had the pleasure of owning, riding, breaking, fixing, [with much help on more serious fuck ups] tweaking and cleaning over nearly half of my life . . . . I ain't ever selling another bike as long as I live !!!

***** Thanks to "TheTerryMcDonald" for posting this superb critter on PooTube and I hope you have at least given it a right flogging on the odd occasion.

DONNA SUMMER "I FEEL LOVE" . . . . IN MEMORY OF THE ONE AND ONLY DISCO DIVA . . . . DONNA SUMMER, DIES AT 63 . . . . SEXY AS HELL, GREAT PIPES, AND, WHETHER SOME CHOOSE TO ADMIT IT OR NOT . . . . A GENUINE GROUNDBREAKER AND PIONEER . . . . SAD TO SEE YOU GO GORGEOUS GIRL, VALE.

I WAS IN GRADE TEN WHEN THIS WAS RELEASED, AT THE SAME TIME I WAS DOING ALL I COULD TO GET MY EARS INTO MORE OF THE NEWLY EMERGENT PUNK STUFF.

EVEN SO, THIS SONG WITH HER 'COME FUCK ME' VISUAL APPEAL AND ORGASMIC VOCAL DELIVERY, IN TANDEM WITH GIORGIO MORODER'S KRAFTWERK INSPIRED SYNTH DRENCHED RHYTHM TRACK LOOP HAD ME GLUED TO THE BOX EVERYTIME IT CAME ON . . . . SHE WAS THE BOLLOCKS AND HER PERFORMANCE ON THAT SONG SHIFTED THE PARADIGM FOR HOW FEMALE SINGERS DELIVERED THEIR MATERIAL.

EVERYTHING ELSE IS BY THE BY, LIKE I SAID, MANY BLOKES WILL CONTINUE TO SLAG HER OFF AS WORTHLESS FLUFF AND CRUMPET, BUT WHEN YOU'RE ENTIRE RECORD COLLECTION CONSISTS ONLY OF LYNYRD SKYNYRD AND THE ALLMAN BROTHERS . . . . WELL, YOU AIN'T IN A POSITION TO PASS JUDGEMENT UNTIL YOU BROADEN YOUR SOUTHERN MAN HORIZONS . . . . DONNA SUMMER - FOREVER HOT STUFF BABY !!!! R.I.P



**** DON'T START TREATING ME LIKE NEIL YOUNG EITHER, I LIKE BOTH OF THEM, BUT SERIOUSLY . . . . IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO STEP OUTSIDE YOUR COMFORT ZONE AND EMBRACE SOMETHING NEW . . . . EVEN IF IT ISN'T THE DISCO QUEEN . . . .

RADIO BIRDMAN "DESCENT INTO THE MAELSTROM" . . . . NICKE AT RIGID HIPS HAS DONE IT AGAIN . . . . TAKING TALENT, PASSION AND LUNACY TO THEIR LOGICALLY EXTREME CONCLUSION . . . . HE'S BEEN RABBITING ON ABOUT THE 'VARD PROPOSITION' FOR WEEKS . . . . NOW HE REVEALS THE FRUITS BORNE OF HIS TWISTED, OBSESSED, GENIUS . . . . GO AND OGLE AT HIS BLOG POST HASTE . . . . HOLY VARDISH VIKINGS BATMAN !!!!!

FOR ALL THE SWEDISH DUDES WHO HAVE BEEN HAVING A GAWK AT MY BLOG OVER THE PAST WEEKS, THANKS HEAPS GUYS, THIS ONE'S FOR YOU . . . . LEGEND AUSSIE OUTFIT AT THEIR PEAK . . . . RADIO BIRDMAN WITH "DESCENT INTO THE MAELSTROM" . . . . ENJOY THAT 'SPECIAL' WATER YOU'RE DRINKING . . . .

BIG, BLACK, BOLD AND BALLSY, THE TRAMPPS "DISCO INFERNO" . . . . IF YOU RECKON THIS DOESN'T GET YOU, YOU'RE LIVIN IN A WORLD OF DOOMED DISCO DENIAL . . . . STEP BACK MOTHERFUCKER, THIS SHIT AIN'T PATRICK HERNANDEZ . . . . SAAAAAAAAAAATISFACTION IS WHAT IT IS !!!!

I'M THE FIRST TO ADMIT THERE WAS A WHOLE MESS OF VAPID, VACUOUS, FLACID, SOFTCOCK DISCO FLOATING AROUND IN THE LATE '70's BUT THESE FINE THREADED MOFOS WEREN'T PART OF THAT MUSICAL PUDDLE OF PISS . . . . THE STANDOUT TRACK FROM THE 'SATURDAY NIGHT QUAGMIRE' DOUBLE SET FROM A STANDUP BUNCH OF DUDES . . . . DISCOFUNKALISCIOUS KIDDIES . . . . BURN BABY BURN, DISCO INFERNAL !!!!!

"SO-CAL MILER AND STREETMASTER AT THE QUAIL" . . . . BUNCH OF BLOODY LEGENDS THIS MOB ARE, COMBINING HERITAGE WITH RIGHT NOW . . . . A SMOKIN HOT INTERPRETATION OF A TRACK STYLE TRUMPY IN CLASSIC SO-CAL LIVERY . . . . AND ITS SO COOL, SO-CAL SIBLING . . . . GOLF, I DON'T GET IT . . . . HUH ???

I'VE FIGURED OUT WHAT GOLF COURSES ARE ACTUALLY GOOD FOR, THAT'S RIGHT, BIKE AND CAR SHOWS, BEATS THE FUCK OUTTA CHASING LITTLE BALLS AROUND THE THING WITH A LONG HANDLED BILLYCLUB !!!!

Once again the shop established by Alex Xydias, now run by Pete Chappouris and spiced up by the talents of one Mr Jimmy Shine, has produced two exceptional pieces of hot rodded sickleness, this time using the Hinkley twin pots as a base . . . . it doesn't really give you the lowdown in this vid that I ripped from PooTube but I'm certain that 'reformed' naughty boy/style guru Jimmy Shine, had a lot to do with the rides in question . . . . both are tres cool, the So-Cal styling tradition established by Xydias on the bellytanker, is successfully captured once again while the second bike just screams 'take me to Springfield immediately' . . . .



There are also some really sweet shots of some of the other bikes they managed to jam onto the Quail golf course for this ultra prestigious show . . . . big thanks to So-Cal Speedshop for taking the footage and turning out two super tasty sleds, don't hide em . . . . ride em on a golf course !!!

"MACHINE" . . . . I RECKON THIS BLOKE BUILDS THE SWEETEST CUSTOM BIKES IN OZ . . . . EVERYTHING HE PRODUCES HAS AN INNATE 'ORGANIC' SENSIBILITY AND FLOW TO IT . . . . JAPANESE, AMERICAN, BRITISH, EUROPEAN . . . . MAN MACHINE/MATT MACHINE, THE GUY IS MENTAL FOR MOTORSICKLES !!!

Matt is one of those multi talented bastards cut from similar cloth as crew like Jeff Wright, anything he turns his hand to comes up a winner . . . . from my perspective, epsecially things with two wheels. I have no qualms in stating here and now, when it comes to custom bike design, building and execution, Mr Machine's portfolio of perfectly presented power platforms is second to none in the land downunder, no wuckers . . . .



Guzzis are a tad like Beemers to a lot of people, they either like em or, as is sadly more often the case, detest them. Me, I'm a long time lover, one of my mentors going back more than two decades reinforced the feeling with his '75 S3 in black and green, Borranis, Dell'Orto's, cams and, of course, shaft driven !!!

The jigger under the spotlight in Matt's video [along with No-Tones, roadkill, corro shacks and landscapes] is something else again, the fucking coolest, most purposeful, individual custom rendering of a Guzzi I've come across, if 'Goose' had been riding a Guzzi in Mad Max it would look like this, bloody stunning !!! He clearly has a thing for Italian scoots too, the bugger also has an immaculate round case SS in his stable as well . . . . like I said . . . . bastard !!!

Anyhow* . . . . have a serious squizz at his blog at "Machine" blogspot, check out some of his builds, his obsession with metallurgy and all things motorcycling, you'll dig it as much as I do !!!! 

"OH BOY . . . . IS THIS GREAT !!! . . . . "

JUST PLACED AN ORDER FROM WELL KNOWN PERFECTIONISTA, KIM AT BCM, FOR ONE OF THE BRAND NEW, HOT OFF THE MILL, ENTICINGLY TUMBLED, BALANCED, NOT BUNGLED, 'THINNER PINNER'S' FOR PROJECT SHOVELLER . . . .

CAN'T WAIT FOR IT'S EMINENT AND IMMINENT ARRIVAL, AT WHICH POINT, I'LL DO THE WHITELINEPYSCHO EVALUATION REPORT . . . . AS ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVE GEEKS, FLOUNDER FROM DELTA HOUSE, SO ELOQUENTLY STATED, "OH BOY . . . . IS THIS GREAT !!!!"

THE CHURCH "UNDER THE MILKY WAY" . . . . LIKELY AT THE TOP OF MY 'BEAUTIFUL TUNES' LIST, AN ODE TO AUSSIE BEING UNDER THE MILKY WAY AND KILBEY'S USUAL FROM THE CENTRE OF HIS GOOFY HEART SCRIBBLINGS . . . . SUCH A COSMIC, FLOATING, ACID DREAMINESS TO THIS OPAL GEM . . . . REMINDS ME OF . . . .

. . . . the year 1988, we'd just finished a gig in a tiny and atmospheric joint by the name of  "La Cucaracha" in downtown Sufferers Parasite, packed room full of the local, Sunday night crew all havin a good time, I'm happily pissed and totally buzzing, great afterglow thing goin on . . . .

I'd noticed this girl, sitting pretty much by herself, gorgeous, fairish, lightly freckled skin, a Jenny Agutter kinda visual appeal, Englishy 'punky' lookin, in a place full of surf crew and spannerheads, this chick stood out like glowing dog's balls, and, we'd been making eye contact . . . . I plucked up the courage and went over to her.



She was gorgeous, magically, cosmically, perfectly gorgeous, on my word, I fell in love instantly, there was a total 'connection', something that was simply 'there', an attraction that was as honest and real as the shit you read about or see in cool movies . . . . THE most special romantic moment in my entire fucking life, including my ex wife, and all other of my three serious, longer term girlfriends, it was a nanosecond event that went straight to my core being and it was fully reciprocated by her.

We had a few more drinks, talked like we'd known each other forever and then went for a drive to a place called 'The Spit', where the river flows out to the sea through a huge, manmade seawall. We sat, facing each other, and talked, shared a joint, talked some more, got amorous without getting down to it and were fully diggin on each other . . . . it was so very special, never experienced a moment of that divine intensity since, it has stayed with me as though it was last night, "Under the Milky Way" drifted across the radio at one point near sunrise and the whole thing felt better than anything before or since, beyond surreal.

Miss Josie Price, resident of Wales in the U.K, had to catch her flight out of Brisbane that day, I drove her to the airport, we had coffee, held hands, talked some more, expressed what we were feeling and said goodbye . . . . no tears, no trauma, no dumb, bullshit words that could never be made real, just perfect and unbridaled truth, hers and mine . . . . I have frequently wondered about her and what she might be up to in the intervening twenty four years . . . . whatever it is, I hope she is a happy girl. 

CULVER CITY WEIRDNESS, THERE IS DEFINITELY A HISTORICAL LINK HERE FOLKS . . . . IT ALL STARTED GETTING A LITTLE BIT 'TWIGHLIGHT ZONE' WITH THE PRE WAR PRODUCTION OF 'THE WIZARD OF OZ' . . . . NOWADAYS WE GOT YANG YANGS, HEY MANGS, ELECTRIC WATERMELONS, MIDGET SEX SHOWS . . . . O.K, FAIR COP, I MADE THAT LAST ONE UP . . . . JUST WANTED TO SET THE SCENE.

WE'RE NOT IN CULVER CITY ANYMORE TOTO . . . .

FROM THE FANTASTIC FLICK THAT HAS BEEN AN INFLUENCE ON BOTH CRO CUSTOMS AND MORE RECENTLY, ALTHOUGH THERE IS A LINK THERE AS WELL, THE FLYING MONKEY FABRICATION ORGANISATION . . . . THE BELOW SCENE ALWAYS GOT ME A BIT EDGEY AS A KID, IT'S ALSO A MOVIE I'LL STILL SIT THROUGH TODAY, THE COLOUR REWORKING HAS ONLY ADDED TO ITS UNIQUE ALLURE . . . .

"JUXTAPOD - FROM CONCEPT TO REALITY" (A UNIQUE PROJECT SPONSORED BY TYROLIT) . . . . A ROD BUILD WITH A DIFFERENCE, FEATURING MATTIAS FROM LEBEEF KUSTOMS AND THE USE OF AN 'OUT THERE' MEDIUM NOT GENERALLY ASSOCIATED WITH HOT RODS . . . . VERY ARTY INDEED, BUT VERY FUCKING COOL . . . . CHECK IT OUT !!!

Anyone who appreciates 'one off', hand crafted, meticulously assembled automotive 'art' will love this mini doc . . . . yet again, I'm left wondering . . . . what the fuck do these guys put in their water ????

FROM "HUNTING HARLEYS" ON POOTUBE, BEEN CHECKIN OUT TODD'S ESCAPADES FOR SIX MONTHS OR SO . . . . ALWAYS WORTH A PERVE BUT THIS PARTICULAR POST TAKES THE FRIGGIN BAR AND THE SHIELD . . . . IF I LUCKED ONTO THIS GLORIOUS '54 RIGID PAN I'D SHOOT MY LOAD . . . . A PERFECT SCORE BY ANY STANDARDS !!!!

Another case of gleaning more little snippits of historical info from a 'greybeard', keepin your ears and eyes open, whether it be out in the world or via magazines, blogs, films, whatever the medium may be, is the key to constantly growing and nurturing your own knowledge . . . . I'm of the belief that the quest for knowledge also increases your desire and passion for those things in life that give you the horn, in my case it's always been bikes, cars, music and a few other constants . . . .

The weird thing is though, just when you think you're approaching the near omniscient level, you get hit with the realisation that in the company of Joe Bloggs or whoever it happens to be, you actually know sweet fuck all . . . . funny thing, life !!!



And speaking of the soon to be released "6 OVER" doco, watching poor old Todd goin through the neverending leg pump routine . . . . it's with some degree of dread that I look forward to getting my '74 shovel completed and on the road . . . . all the years of prodding and poking, swearing and sweating over a series of Trumpy's comes flooding back in three dimensional clarity.

The sweet rewards of nailing it on the first, even second or third kick, are often overshadowed by the times you stand there, beside the lifeless Satan Scoot, wishing you could simply shoot the fucker !!!! I would be lying through my yellowing, old teeth if I was to say I haven't been enjoying the delights of the buzz button on the Skirtster the last twenty months . . . .

"JACOB AND THE GUITAR MAN" - FOR EVERYONE WHO HAS A NORMAL, HEALTHY CHILD, WATCH THIS AND THANK THE POWERS OF THE UNIVERSE . . . . THIS IS TRULY TOUCHING, ONE OF LIFE'S REALLY SPECIAL MOMENTS . . . . YEAH, I CRIED, AND I'M SO VERY THANKFUL . . . .

TYLER GREGORY PLAYS SOME REAL AND RICH BLUEGRASS BUT THIS BEAUTIFUL MICRO MOMENT WILL BE SOMETHING THAT BOTH HE AND JACOB WILL SHARE TOGETHER FOREVER . . . . WOW, THE POWER OF MUSIC AND THE TOTAL INNOCENCE OF A VERY SPECIAL YOUNG BOY . . . . THANKS TYLER GREGORY, MADE MY DAY.



***** BTW, Tyler's busking here doing "Midnight Special", however, for those who like a dash of real Kentuchy Bluegrass, check out his other stuff on PooTube . . . . true blue, the real deal

FREAKING OUT THE SQUARES, DEFINING MOMENTS . . . . THE WHO "MY GENERATION" LIVE ON THE 'SMOTHERES BROTHERS' 1967 . . . . ALONG WITH JIMI NAPALMING HIS STRAT, ONE OF 'THE' PROTO GIGS OF THE TIME . . . . THE ORIGINAL 'STURM UND DRANG' PIONEERS OF ROCK + ROLL !!!!

I would love to have been fifteen and watching this in front of the telly with my mum and dad back in the day, just to see and hear my dear mother get her freakout on and go into meltdown, this clip still makes the hairs on my sack stand to attention . . . . the song itself is probably the arch statement of defiance for the generation of the time but it's this electric performance of the Greater London Guitar Stealers Guild in cahoots with The Society of Pummeling Pisshead Percussionists live on national t.v that is still a benchmark in the sheer brute power of a three minute rock song.



As Mr Smothers #1 intros the band you can sense an 'attitude' in all the members, even the usually more docile Entwhistle seems to bristle with pent up tension in just wanting to get the fuck under way and rip in . . . . and rip in they did, live, loud and in the face of every 'straight' in the land, when a lot of folk were still attempting to make sense of the Fab Four and the Stones, nobody attacked the stage like this London quartet . . . .

The maniacal Moon on skins, the psychotic windmill, Townshend on guitar, the menacingly brooding presence of Big John on bass and the stuttering, stammering sex panther, Daltrey running amok on vocals and lasso/mic . . . . sheer fucking dynomite !!!! Make no bones about it, this was one of the great, single song performances of the decade . . . . take no prisoners, death by noise !!!

****** READ THE FOOTNOTE IN THE COMMENTS SECTION ON POOTUBE TO SEE THE DAMAGE DONE BY THE OVER AMPED PYROTECHNICS DISPLAY . . . . NOTHING EVER SUCCEEDS QUITE LIKE EXCESS !!!!

"PANHEAD BILLY BURROWS - BACKROADS LITTLE ORLEANS MD" . . . . FILE UNDER 'WHEN GREYBEARD MYTH BECOMES REALITY' . . . . THE SUBJECT OF MANY AN ARTICLE AND OBSERVATION IN PRINT OVER THE YEARS, SIGHTED BY MANY ACROSS THE U.S . . . . PANHEAD BILLY IS LIVING HIS DREAM ON A DAILY BASIS . . . . THIS IS PACKED AND READY TO ROLL, A MAN, HIS SWAG AND HIS RIDE . . . .

OFTEN SEEN IN PHOTOS AT PLACES WHERE BIKES AND RIDERS TEND TO GRAVITATE, CONGREGATE AND MEDITATE, THESE ARE THE FIRST MOVING PICS I'VE SEEN OF THE MAN, HIS MACHINE AND HIS NOT INCONSIDERABLE SWAG . . . . HAVIN A YARN WITH THIS BLOKE AND HIS ILK THE WORLD OVER IS ALWAYS A GAS, IF YOU EVER GET THE CHANCE, DON'T PASS UP THE OPPORTUNITY . . . . LOVIN TO RIDE, RIDIN TO LIVE !!!

"ENGLISH CHOPPER SCENE FROM THE '60's" TAKEN FROM POOTUBE AND POSTED BY "MBF109E" . . . . PROBABLY THE EARLY 70's MORE LIKELY BUT A GOOD INSIGHT INTO THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE U.K/AUSSIE/EURO SCENE AND THAT OF UNCLE SAM AT THE TIME . . . . A RELIANCE ON BRIT TWINS AND JAPPAS, THE HONDA FOUR PARTICULARLY, IS THE MOST OBVIOUS SEPERATION GIVEN THE RELATIVE SCARCITY OF HARLEYS BACK THEN . . . .

My own observation over the last twenty odd years is that the worldwide proliferation of specifically classic 'West Coast' influenced chops is really a relatively recent thing, prior to this, the Poms, Europeans and those down here in the Antipodes had developed a style of bike quite a bit apart from the North American/Cali definition as is so internationally popular now . . . .

In many cases, they were a little bit 'vaccuum sealed' in the slightly curious period of the mid to late sixties when the principle styles of Yank bike were really being defined, primarily I suppose, the Long Bike, the Frisco chop and, a bee's dick later, the Digger . . . . fuck, I know what I mean, just havin a wee bit of difficulty articulating it . . . . I guess what I'm saying is, with some obvious exceptions, I, and probably lots of you from both sides of the Atlantic, could generally pick what side of the pond a scoot emanated from simply by looking at it . . . .



This is certainly no longer so much the case, the spontaneous and implacable forces of 'cultural imperialism' that have seen three generations of people around the world become focused and fixated on Uncle Sam since the end of WWII, music, film, fashion, cars, bikes, skateboards, toys and the list goes on, [this is NOT a criticism, merely a statement of fact] has seen the popular image of what we all love about custom bikes become way more unified and homogeneous . . . . a bike from Sweden or Finland could easily be mistaken for one from Osaka or Sendai just as soon as they could all have come from some garage in the 'burbs of Oakland, Venice Beach, St. Kilda or Blacktown or Rio via Vancouver . . . . or 'Sarf' London care of Derby.

I reckon this is the best part of the whole caper, everyone is so much closer courtesy of the internet that the 'lag factor' no longer exists, as much as it has dumbed down certain elements it has been responsible for bringing a bunch of like minded, kindred spirits closer together and thereby as a result, intensifying the collective experience . . . .

Bum !!! I hope you kinda got it . . . . it's all good in a thousand hoods . . . . my brain hurts . . . . must get some vino into me post haste . . . .

THE LATE, GREAT, BENT OUTTA SHAPE, HASIL [HASSLE] ADKINS "SHE SAID" LIVE AND LOOSE . . . . THE MAN WAS A LEGITIMATE ONE OFF LEGEND . . . . BEEN SEARCHIN FOR LIVE FOOTAGE OF HIM FOR YEARS . . . . ALWAYS THOUGHT THIS WAS JUST A COVER AND SKIPPED IT FOREVER, WRONG . . . . THE REAL McCOY, THE ONE AND ONLY, R.I.P HELLBILLY HASIL.

I FIRST CAME ACROSS THIS MANIC MUSICAL MARAUDER BACK IN 1982 ON A GREAT COMPILATION ALBUM, "ROCKABILLY PSYCHOSIS AND THE GARAGE DISEASE", THIS SONG BLEW MY GREASY LITTLE MIND, ALONG WITH THE LEGENDARY STARDUST COWBOY . . . . RAW, VISCERAL, LOOSE AND WHAT WOULDA BEEN COMPLETE AND UTTER MINDFUCK MATERIAL WHEN IT WAS RELEASED BACK IN AROUND '65 OR THEREABOUTS, IT IS ARGUABLY THE SEMINAL 'PSYCHOBILLY' TRACK, GROUND POINT ZERO IN THE GENRE . . . .



COULD YOU IMAGINE WHAT MR AND MRS MIDDLE CLASS WOULD'VE SAID WHEN THEY HEARD THIS SHIT WHEN THEY WERE STILL TRYING TO GET THEIR TINY MELONS AROUND THE BEATLES AND THE STONES . . . . ????

SADLY, THIS PIONEER KICKED ON TO THE GREAT HOTDOG STAND IN THE SKY BACK IN THE MID TWO THOUSANDS BUT THIS TRACK AND HIS OTHER RELEASES WILL LIVE ON AND CONTINUE TO GAIN THE RECOGNITION THEY SO DESERVE.

"DP CUSTOMS 'GRAFFITI' HARLEY IRONHEAD" . . . . JUST TRAWLING AIMLESSLY THROUGH THE DEPTHS OF POOTUBE AND DREDGED THIS UP . . . . I DIG IT, DIRTY BIG HOOSIER ARSE END, SEXY/TOUGH TAPERED TWO INTO ONE . . . . INSPIRED BY FALFA'S '55 FROM 'AMERICAN GRAFFITTI' . . . . I CAN SEE IT.

I'm not a huge fan of Hoosies for my own purposes, nor the popular and revered period correctness of the legendary Avon 'Deathmaster' and their re-pop siblings, but shit, it's a killer look !!! As bits and pieces start to accumulate in preparation for the serious side of 'Operation Shoveller' and its imminent deconstruction/reconstruction, I've come to some definite conclusions as to what I will and won't be doing regarding things aesthetic, mechanical and functional . . . . .



When it comes to tire selection I'm definitely not going to be running Deathmasters, Cokers, doughy old Dunny's or any other 'classic' or 'period' bags, sorry purists, just not on . . . . the first T120 I got in the late eighties had one of the ribbed tarmac ticklers on the front, perished and fully fucked, I stupidly had it replaced with a new one . . . . it was fantastic, as long as grip, handling and water dispersion were not going to enter into your calculations, only to be equalled by reinstalling a Dunlop K81 on the arse end, I swear it began hardening and cracking the first time I rode it in the daylight . . . . you just don't realise how tragic they are until you fit some actual 'tires' to your rims, which is what happened with the '74 T140V I picked up a year and half later, what a difference !!!

No, you guys can have my share of all the ridgey didge vintage tire allocation, all of it, I like the idea of being able push my only point of contact with Terra Firma to the max if the situation should demand it . . . . fuck the entire fingers crossed approach of rollin on dinosaur rubber with a built in deathwish, call me soft, I like the notion of keeping the shiny side up at all times . . . . I'll be running a good oldish ME 33 at the pointy end and the matched up 'pineapple' tread Metzy on the arse end, I know em, I like em and they never let it slide on the old Trumpys, the Shoveller may well be my first Hoggly chop but I figure they'll do just fine and dandy . . . . rubber side down lads, stay safe.

MY BLOODY VALENTINE "YOU MADE ME REALISE" . . . . THAT I REALLY DON'T LIKE YOU AT ALL . . . . FOR A GIRL I KNOW . . . . TO MIX MY MUSICAL METAPHORS . . . . SOMETHING BOUT THE WAY YOU TASTE MAKES ME WANNA CLEAR MY THROAT . . . . NOT MUCH SUBSTANCE AT ALL DARLING . . . .

It's always a "eureka moment" when a tune you've always dug suddenly embues itself with an entirely new resonance and meaning . . . . I'll be fine honey, especially if you're not. Much love, XX.

AC/DC - "BACK IN BLACK" 1980 . . . . TALK ABOUT RISING PHOENIX LIKE FROM THE ASHES . . . . WHEN BON DIED, I, LIKE MILLIONS OF OTHER FANS AROUND THE WORLD, FIGURED IT WAS ALL OVER FOR OUR AUSSIE ROCKERS . . . . NO WAY COULD THEY GO ON WITHOUT THE INCREDIBLE PRESENCE OF THEIR BELOVED FRONTMAN AND UBER SHOWMAN . . . . I MEAN, WHAT'S THE CHANCE OF EVER FINDING A HALF ADEQUATE REPLACEMENT ???? ENTER BRIAN JOHNSON.

IT WAS TOWARD THE END OF MY FIRST YEAR AT UNI WHEN THE NEWS STARTED TO FILTER OUT THAT ACCA DACCA WERE ABOUT TO RELEASE A NEW ALBUM MINUS BON SCOTT . . . . I WAS IMMEDIATELY A FULLY BLOWN SCEPTIC, NO FUCKING WAY COULD ANYBODY FILL THOSE SHOES, LET ALONE WITH THAT LINEUP OF HEAVY HITTERS IN THE BAND BEHIND THEM . . . .

I'D SEEN THEM ONCE, AT THE END OF 1975 WHEN 'LONG WAY TO THE TOP' WAS GOING GANGBUSTERS, AT THE GOULBURN SHOWGROUNDS . . . . LEG IN PLASTER FROM TOES TO TESTICLES AFTER BREAKING MY LEG ON MY BRAND NEW PRIMO FREESTYLE/CHICAGO TRUCKS/CADILLAC WHEELS SKATEBOARD . . . . MY FIRST REAL GIG AND THEY WERE TOTALLY MINDBLOWING !!



So, when the talk of a new record without the wild man of Aussie rock surfaced I thought 'not a bloody snowflake's chance in hell', I was not alone, nobody could foresee what was about to go down . . . . we were in David Trigger's room, mid arvo, musta been September/October, radio playing in the background, then it started, tic toc tic toc tic toc . . . . da dadada dadada didadada . . . . what the fuck !!! Then, the hardest, toughest, beyond Lemmy roughest, vocals join the barrage, it couldn't have been any other band than AC/DC . . . . but Bon was dead, who the fuck was this throat tearing, gravel gargling, blood spitting singer doin the yodellin . . . . ????

It was of course, Brian Johnson, ex lead crooner for northern England rockers, 'Geordie", and all round good bloke, he fitted like a finger in a bum, not only had they found a replacement but someone capable of instantly creating his own place and style within an existing act without compromising in any way its track record . . . . furthermore, and this is the fucking kicker for mine . . . . the entire package of album title paying homage and respects to Bon, the choice of material therein and the new guy being his own, down to earth, grounded man and not overplaying the thing, lead them to a future that went from fucking bright to dazzlingly brilliant overnight . . . . perhaps that may never have happened even if Bon Scott had not met such a tragic and premature end . . . . I still love everything, every song they ever did with Bon, yet for me, "Back in Black" will always be my most loved AC/DC long player.

HALL AND OATES "SHE'S GONE" 1973/76 . . . . I'LL FESS UP NOW, I'M A HALL AND OATES FAN AND IT WAS THIS LITTLE NUMBER THAT DID IT FOR ME . . . . IT'S ALWAYS BEEN FASHIONABLE TO PUT SHIT ON 'BLUE EYED' SOUL ACTS, HOWEVER . . . . FUCK FASHION !!!! THIS ODE TO LOSING THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE IS UNIVERSAL IN ITS TRUTH . . . . TRIPPY EL CHEAPO CLIP TOO, DIG THE THREADS AND ACCESSORIES, PERIOD CORRECT FOR SURE !!

I suppose it's because a lot of, if not all, whiteys who attempt the 'soul thang' just look so fucking soft, or perhaps it's because the male of the species, by and large, won't let themselves succumb to the overt emotion of the loss of love publicly . . . . "I ain't gonna cry over that shit man, hell, no way !!!" . . . . but the reality is the feelings and emotion expressed in songs like this original version of "She's Gone", not the '76 remake, are as universal and similar as the nature of love itself.

Maybe it's a more white male thing to gravitate toward obviously butch 'come fuck me wench' stuff like Led Zep or Ted Nugent, both of whom I love, but the more obvious emotive narratives of material such as this, tend to engender a vibe that many guys won't openly acknowledge . . . . to do so would be putting yourself out there for a bagging by your mates and cronies, an afront to your sense of manhood and masculinity, being in touch with your inner self in public just ain't so cool . . .



I don't give a flying, fairy fuck, good music is good music, all styles, all colours, all ages, as long as it's good, rule out Knickelback, Dautry and a whole truck load of others immediately, and Hall and Oates have always been good . . . . unbelievable melodies, fine vocals, great players and constantly sound production, in the world of 'Blue Eyed Soul", these guys are the fucking real deal kings !!!!

1965 FORD SHELBY COBRA, GT 350 AND GOOD OL' SHEL HIMSELF . . . . TWICE IN A WEEK NOW I'VE WOKEN UP TO SAD NEWS OF PERSONAL ICONS . . . . LAST WEEK IT WAS ADAM YAUCH AND THIS MORNING . . . . MR CARROL SHELBY, JANUARY 11TH 1923 - MAY 10TH 2012 . . . . R.I.P

THE TALL TEXAN AUTOMOTIVE ICON WHO RACED, DESIGNED AND DEVELOPED MORE FOUR WHEELED LEGENDS THAN JUST ABOUT ANY OTHER BLOKE IN POST WWII HISTORY HAS DRIVEN OFF TO THE RACETRACK IN THE SKY . . . . THE SHELBY A.C COBRA, SHELBY MUSTANG, THE FORD GT40, SHELBY DAYTONA COUPE AND THE DODGE VIPER WERE ALL HIS, ALL HAVE GONE ON TO BECOME REVERED ALL OVER THE WORLD . . . .

HIS PART IN TAKING THE GT40 TO FERRARI ARSE KICKING SUCCESS AT LE MANS IN FOUR CONSECUTIVE YEARS IS SOMETHING THAT WILL NEVER BE EXCEDED IN ITS SHEER BRAVADO AND ULTIMATE GLORY . . . . IT MADE MR FORD A VERY HAPPY CHAPPY WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY PISSING OFF MR FERRARI AND THE EUROPEANS IN A BIG WAY . . . . END RESULT . . . . 'LET'S CHANGE THE RULES AND BAN THEM'

CARROL SHELBY . . . . RACER, DESIGNER, BUILDER, LEGEND . . . . LIKE AVIATION ICON CHUCK YEAGER, A MAN POSSESSED OF 'THE RIGHT STUFF' . . . . YOU'LL BE MISSED . . . . R.I.P

'FREESTYLE NEW YEAR'S EVE RUN 2012' . . . . LOTS OF COOL, RELATIVELY UNKNOWN RIDES [TO ME AT LEAST] OUT HAVING A NICE GROUP PUTT . . . . JEEZ I'D LOVE TO GET MY BONES TO THE MOONEYES GIG !!!!

***** NO PRIZES TO ANYONE FOR POSTING COMMENTS ABOUT THE CHOICE OF TUNE IN THIS CLIP . . . . WE ALL KNOW WHERE IT'S FROM . . . . I THINK IT'S A BIT OF A TRIBUTE THING MYSELF . . . . AGAIN, JUST KICK BACK AND CHECK IT OUT, IF IT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE INTO, ALL GOOD JUST MOVE ON . . . . WE'LL RECONVENE AT A DATE TO BE SET.

"EXPRESSWAY CRUISE" . . . . Mmmmmmmmmmmm . . . . ABSOLUTELY DELICIOUS, THANKYOU SIR, MAY I HAVE ANOTHER !!!!

***** YES, I KNOW THE RIDING AIN'T AS HARD CORE AS SOME . . . . TRY AND FOCUS ON THE BIKES . . . . OR JUST BAIL IF IT AIN'T YOUR SCENE . . . . NO VINDICTIVE PLEASE.

THREE TOTALLY SCHWEET VIDS FROM THE HOME OF FASTIDIOUS ATTENTION TO INSANE LEVELS OF DETAIL . . . . THE FIRST IS THIS BEAUTIFUL '70 MODEL CROWN UTE, ['PICK UP' FOR THE YANKS] COMPLETE WITH GREAT TRACK FROM "SUBLIME" AT NO EXTRA COST . . . . THE NEXT IS A FULLY SICK AND SLICK TRUMPY CAFE/BOBBER JIGGER, SOOOOO COOL . . . . AND THE THIRD IS A COLLECTION OF CHOPS, BOBS, FLOBS, SLOBS AND JOPS ON THE ROAD AND BREEZIN ALONG THE EXPRESSWAY . . . . JUST A WHOLE VISUAL SALAD OF TIGHT AND BRIGHT SPEED MOSHEENS.

***** ALL VIDEO FOOTAGE CARE OF 'UNDERGOUNDKILLJP' POSTED ON POOTUBE, A BIG THANKS MATE, SOME SERIOUSLY BEWDIFUL KIT . . . . ENJOY IT FOLKS !!!!

UNRESTORED EXCELSIOR "BIG X" COMPLETE WITH UNRESTORED BIG NOISE . . . . FROM THE ALWAYS INTERESTING 'WHEELSTHROUGHTIME' POOTUBE CHANNEL . . . . YET ANOTHER CERTIFIED RACING LEGEND WITH A 'GENUINE' UNMOLESTED PATINA . . . . THERE'S A LINK HERE - A 'PATINA' ONLY COMES WITH AGE, OTHER THAN THAT, IT'S A DECEPTIVE PAINT JOB.

I don't know about everybody else, but for me, a significant part of falling irretrievably and irrevocably in love with cars, bikes, buses, trucks, guns, farts and the like as an anklebiter was the sound, that visceral, near primeval roar/bang/thump of loud fast things . . . . then realising around the age of six or thereabouts, with real, boyish clarity, that they all have their own unique and utterly individual cadence and note, a sound that could only mean the machine approaching you, as yet unseen, can only be a V8, or the neighbour's '71 Commando, or your own dad's hot, triple carb, six pot GTR-XU1 Torana . . . . you just know it is, no fucking doubt !!!!



I grew up on Naval bases in the sixties at the height of the Cold War and Vietnam, generally within spitting distance of Air Force bases and Army barracks, having a father who was big on cars, albeit road cars not rods, and an uncle who worked at the Blue Oval and owned a Walla, another one who used to ride an AJS 350, I was fully steeped in the infernally combusting symphonies of life . . . .

I could pick a Land Rover from a Land Cruiser, a C130 from a DC4, a Mirage from a Skyhawk and a GT Falcon from a 289 Fairlane, a .50 cal Browning from a 40mm Bofors on sound alone by the time I was eight, these magnificent, metallic machines were such a thrill to watch but the real kick was the glorious racket they made in motion. The noise they emitted was the thing that made the hairs on my schoolboy arms stand on end, it was the the reason my jaw dropped open and I choked on a fly at an air show once . . . . it gave me the horn !!!

And now, nearly forty five years later, it's the cacophony of the suck/squeeze/bang/blow formula and all the various permutations thereof, that still can bring me to a total standstill, telling all within earshot to shut the fuck up while I listen to a Duke on the pin somewhere in the distance or try to discern whether the bang we just heard was a backfiring Vee Dub or the crack of a medium size handgun . . . . so, in this bonzer clip I bone right up just listening to the gutteral growling and crazed cracking of a piece of machinery so wild in its day it would've scared the shit out of virtually anyone except those fellas with the Big X ballbag option who chose to throw a leg over the monsters, crank the wrist all the way back and dice with the demon Death all for the the thrill of it . . . .

Goddamn, I love motorcycles . . . . and cars . . . and trucks . . . oh, trains, planes . . . . guns . . . . and farts . . . .  

FASHION "LOVE SHADOW" . . . . JUST WANT TO PUT IT OUT THERE, ALL GIRLIES ARE EXEMPTED FROM MY PREVIOUS RANT . . . . ANY BLOKE CAN UNDERSTAND CHICKS WANTING TO GLAM IT UP IN COOL THREADS, OLD JACKETS, BOOTS ETC . . . . GO GIRLS, WE'RE LOVIN YOUR WORK . . . . JUST STAY AWAY FROM THAT PATINA CAPER !!!!

WHITE BOY FUNKY STUFF AT ITS FINEST, A RELATIVELY LITTLE KNOWN U.K BAND FROM THE EARLY EIGHTIES . . . . SHMOOTH AS A BABY'S BUM, COOL SOUNDS AND A GREAT BACKGROUND FOR GETTING AMOROUS . . . . ONE OF MY FAVE SOUNDS FROM BACK IN THE DAY AND STILL DOIN THE SHIT FOR ME TODAY . . . . FOR ALL THE FINE FEMALE TYPES OUT THERE, ESPECIALLY OLIVIA BANANAS AND POOTER GIRL, BOTH THESE LADIES ARE RIDIN AND STYLIN . . . . OOH LA LA !!!!

THIS IS A FREEDOM OF OPINION FORUM, I JUST WANT TO STRESS THAT THE FOLLOWING TRANSMISSION IS STRICTLY MY OPINION . . . . A PERSONAL AND HIGHLY SUBJECTIVE VIEW THAT MAY OFFEND SOME READERS . . . . TOUGH FUCKING LUCK, STOP READING NOW AND PISS OFF !!!!

I ADORE AND RESPECT ALL THE BLOKES, AND CHICKS, OUT THERE TURNING OUT GREAT RIDES ASSEMBLED WITH MADNESS AND PASSION AND UTILISING NOTHING OTHER THAN GENUINE PERIOD PARTS, CHECK MY BLOG LIST, THEY'RE ALL OVER IT, THE REAL McCOY'S . . . . SCROUNGED, SCAVENGED, SWAPPED, TRADED, HAGGLED OVER, BOUGHT AND SENT FROM ALL CORNERS OF THE GLOBE, IT IS AN HONOURABLE AND WORTHY PURSUIT, KEEPING OLD MOTORS, FRAMES, SEATS, FRONT ENDS, LIGHTS AND THE LIKE ALIVE AND FUNCTIONING . . . .



What shits me off is this whole recently arrived at use of the word 'patina-ed' and the building of bikes that someone has spent countless hours 'patina-ing' every surface, every nut and bolt, to give it the perfect faux fucked finish . . . . the 'I been ridin this scoot for twenty five years and parking it in the surf every night' look, the 'I'm a hardcore biker and it's all about the function, I don't give a rat's arse what it looks like' bullshit . . . .

I'm just fucking over it, like I'm over three hundred dollar a pair designer torn jeans and thousand dollar second hand jackets and engineer boots that come with 'how to tell your story' tags . . . . this kinda shit is fake, phony, furball, fuck off, softcock, wannabe, wood duck, dipshit, bullshit at it's most contrived, it's try hard, die soft, scenester queen, less than has been, pretender, truth bender, instant wanker, Ravi bloody Shanker, Paul Jr's offshore banker bollocks !!!!

YOU WANT THE 'WORN IN LOOK' ON SOMETHING SWEETPEA ???? GET THE FUCK OUT THERE AND USE IT . . . . GET A BIKE AND RIDE THE LIVIN SHIT OUTTA IT, PLANT YOUR ARSE IN YOUR CAR AND PUT SOME MILES ON IT . . . . WANT AN OLD BIKE ?? BUY AN OLD BIKE THEN SPEND THE TIME TO ACQUIRE LEGIT OLD PARTS WITH LEGIT OLD PART 'PATINA' AT NO EXTRA COST, IMAGINE THAT ??? HERE'S AN IDEA, BUY A PAIR OF BRAND NEW JEANS AND 'WEAR' THE FUCKERS 'OUT' !!!!

BUT I GUESS A LOT OF FOLK THESE DAYS JUST WANT THE 'LOOK' WITHOUT ALL THE ASSOCIATED BOTHER, THE REWARDS WITHOUT THE WORK, THE SURFACE, NOT THE SUBSTANCE, THE SCENE, NOT THE SOUL . . . . YOU CAN'T BUY IT AND YOU SURE AS SHIT CAN'T GET IT 'PATINA-D' . . . . IT COMES FROM THE HEART AND AIN'T EVER SUBJECT TO THE FICKLE DICTATES OF FASHION.

***** P.R [post rant] I've incuded a nice video to watch . . . . there is no connection to the above diatribe . . . . honestly . . . . trust me, I'm a politician.

PUBLIC SERVICE BROADCASTING - "SPITFIRE" . . . . THE MOST EXCITING SOUNDS I'VE HEARD ALL YEAR THUS FAR, [WITH THE EXCEPTION OF THE ODDBALL GENIUS FROM SWEDEN'S LATEST PROJECT] . . . . STOLE IT FROM THE 'SIDEBURN' LADS WHO THREW IT UP YESTERDAY . . . . A LEGITIMATELY UNIQUE SOUNDSCAPE BACKED BY A CLEVER VIDEO FEATURING SOME CLASSIC B+W FOOTAGE ON THE SUBJECT MATTER AT HAND.

FOR ALL THE GUFF ON THE ARTIST AND THE BACKGROUND HAVE A QUICK TRIP OVER TO THE CIRCLE AND DIRT MASTERS BLOG AT 'SIDEBURN BLOGSPOT' . . . . YOU SHOULD BE FOLLOWING THEM ANYWAY, COOL MUDDY STUFF, ONLY ONE DIRECTION TO FOCUS ON, IT'S ALWAYS 'LEFT', AND A BUNCH OF HILARIOUS COMMENTS AS WELL, WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DO YOU WANT FOR NOTHING . . . . ????

"THE VINCENT" AND WHEN I SAY "THE" VINCENT. I MEAN "THE FUCKING VINCENT" . . . . YOU'RE A BETTER BIKE THAN I AM GUNGA DIN . . . . THE TEST BED PLATFORM RACED BY GEORGE BROWN, THE FORERUNNER OF THE SHADOW AND THE LIGHTNING . . . . LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, I THOUGHT IT HAD BECOME A NEAR MYTH, LONG GONE . . . . WRONG !!! HERE IT IS, IN THE FLESH !!!!

FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW, THE 'GUNGA DIN' VINNIE WAS THE STEVENAGE FIRM'S RACE BIKE RIDDEN TO ALL MANNER OF RACE AND SPEED TIME TRIAL GLORY BY EPIC BRIT JOCKEY GEORGE BROWN DURING THE LATE FORTIES . . . . IT WAS "THE" BLACK BIKE THAT INITIATED THE SOON TO BE GLOBAL LEGEND OF THE POMMIE V-TWIN'S POTENTIAL FOR THEN UNRIVALED SPEED, HANDLING AND INDIVIDUAL RIDER SETUP.

IT WAS ALSO GROUND POINT ZERO FOR THE DEVELOPMENTAL WORK THAT WOULD ULTIMATELY LEAD TO THE RELEASE OF THE BLACK SHADOW AND THEN, VINCENT'S UBER LEGEND SPEED MOSHEEN, THE BLACK LIGHTNING . . . . ALL THE LEAD UP R+D WORK WAS DONE USING GEORGE AND HIS VINNIE AS THE PLATFORM, THE LEGEND STATES THAT PHIL IRVING COULD TEAR DOWN AND REBUILD THE BEAST'S MOTOR WITH A BLINDFOLD ON AND ONE HAND TIED BEHIND HIS BACK !!!



IF YOU'RE INTO THE BROADER HISTORY OF SUPER COOL MOTORCYCLES AND THE MAKING THEREOF, YOU NEED TO HAVE A SQUIZ AND A LISTEN TO THIS BITCHIN BIT OF MINIDOCO FOOTAGE POSTED ON POOTUBE BY 'UTWCO1', HE ALSO HAS SOME OTHER COOL REFERENCE VIDS TO SCROLL THROUGH AS WELL . . . .

THE BUZZCOCKS "WHY CAN'T I TOUCH IT ?" . . . . SET AGAINST A FAIRLY TASTY UPLOADER MADE CLIP . . . . I HAD THE CHANCE TO SEE DIGGLE, SHELLEY AND THE COCKS TWICE IN THE LATE EIGHTIES/EARLY NINETIES . . . . BOTH TIMES THEY WERE THE PERFECT BAND . . . . BUT FROM WHERE WE STOOD IN THE THRONG IT WAS A NEW TENSION IN A DIFFERENT KIND OF KITCHEN . . . .

Pete Shelley had found huge international success in the early eighties with 'Homosapien' which clearly put the shits right up Steve Diggle, in combination with the ill will existing already between the band's two principle players after an acrimonious split after the last studio album . . . . apparently friction between them on tour after the reformation was wound tight and very visible the whole way through, by the time they hit Oz, it was death stares at ten paces . . . .



THE BAND PLAYED BRILLIANTLY, BOTH TOURS, ALL THE CLASSICS, ONE AFTER ANOTHER, VOCALS, GUITARS, BASS AND DRUMS ALL IN PIN POINT PRECISION, FUCK ME, YOU DON'T QUITE REALISE THE EXTENT AND DEPTH OF THEIR CATALOGUE OF TUNES UNTILL YOU HEAR THEM LIVE, THIS PAIR OF MANCUNIANS WROTE SOME OF THE BESY AND MOST UNIQUE MUSIC OF THE ENTIRE PUNK/POST PUNK EPOCH !!!!

Throughout both gigs, about eighteen months apart, Messrs Shelley and Diggle had no interaction with each other on stage, icy would've seemed warm, if it was 'cordial' it was frozen into popsicles !! At the conclusion of the gig on the first tour of '89 or thereabouts, Diggle came straight from the stage, guitar in its stand, still 'on' and screaming feedback, and started handing out these weird little pamphlets among the audience . . . . feeling a bit insecure Stevie lad . . . . Pete's solo success getting up your snout . . . . big plans for a nothing solo release . . . . fuck me, why would you put yourself in the position of confirming to the gathered masses that you're jealous as hell and green with envy about the one hit wonder that 'Homo Sapien' was . . . . ???? Weirdorama Dalai Lama !!!

It's all beside the point for the band that was formed hot on the heels of the Sex Pistols legendary first gig in Manchester, [both Diggle and Shelley actually were there as opposed to the many thousands who say they were . . . see my post of some months ago] they collectively penned some of the most memorable and loved songs of the time and are still seriously influential to this day. If you haven't got any of their albums in your collection you need to get your shit wired tight and get on board . . . . The Buzzcocks, a delightfully different kind of tension.

1912 FLYING MERKEL REPLICA ON THE RUN . . . . GOT TO ADMIRE AND RESPECT THE DEDICATION AND COMMITMENT THAT GOES INTO RECREATING A PERFECT PIECE OF TWO WHEELED HISTORY . . . . CHECK OUT THE CLOSE UP SHOTS WHILE LUXURIATING IN THE NOISE !!!!

Somebody posted a still of this same model the other day so off on another search and deploy mission I went, dredged this nice bit of footage from "Arielmanlan" posted on PooTube from a 2008 show in the land of the Maple Leaf . . . . keep in mind that this isn't, as I initially assumed it would be, a restoration, but rather a meticulously detailed replication of the 1912 boardtracker produced by the once great "Flying Merkel" mob . . . .



These wonderful jiggers were in the same league as their contemporaries of the day in racing on the massive board tracks, Super X, Henderson, Indian and Harley and the Merkels, all going hammer and tongs at speeds of over 100 mph, no car came close . . . . safety gear comprised nothing more than leather underpants, lids made from elephant scrotums and a pair of quadruple XL testicles.

Anyway, check this gorgeous bit of kit out, the motor is basically original but a majority of the cycle parts and frame have been hand fabbed by the owner from detailed photos, drawings and information supplied by Flying Merkel Freaks around the world . . . .    A-fucking-mazing !!!!

MAQUOKETA TORQUE FEST 2012 . . . . MEANWHILE, SOMEWHERE IN DEEPEST, DARKEST IOWA . . . . I SUPPOSE IT'S ONLY FAIR AND FITTING THAT HAVING INVENTED THE HOT ROD CAPER, YOU BLOODY YANKS ARE SO SPOILT FOR CHOICE OF EVENTS ON ANY GIVEN WEEKEND . . . . THIS ONE'S FOR NOOT AND WES, LUCKY BASTARDS !!!!

'TheArtist53' popped this one up on PooTube and after having been through some fucking grouse shots on Noot's blog, I decided to go fishing for some more . . . . these are all stills but the compilation and the composition is really cool as is the choice of soundtrack . . . . Chuck Berry, the Father of Rock + Roll guitar, can't go wrong with that shit, so wind the noiseometer up to 'annoy the neighbours' level, punch the play knob, kick back and enjoy this tidy overview of what looks like a too cool gig.

RANCID "TIME BOMB", FOR A BUNCH OF WEST COAST PUNKS THEY SURE SOUNDED REAL U.K . . . . TWO MINUTES OF FARFISA FILLED FOOT STOMPIN YARD PARTY SHIT . . . . BEEN THINKING OF POSTING THIS FOR A WHILE . . . . THE LAST TWO DAYS FINALLY TIPPED ME OVER THE EDGE !!!!

OFF FOR A NICE DAY IN THE SADDLE, PERFECT BLUE SKIES, CLEAN OIL AND FILTER IN THE SKIRTSTER AND TWO MATES WHO I ENJOY RIDING WITH, GOTTA LOVE A PUBLIC HOLIDAY MONDAY . . . . RANCID, A BUNCH OF REAL DEAL LADS DOING THE PUNK IDEALS TOTAL JUSTICE . . . . THE BOY'S A TIME BOMB . . . . SURE IS !!!

BECK "WHERE IT'S AT" 1995 . . . . THE NEWS OF MCA MOVING ONTO THE BIG GIG IN THE SKY GOT ME THINKING OF ANOTHER GOOFY, GEEKY, MUSICAL SUPER DORK I LOVE, BECK . . . . WEIRD THING IS I SAW EM BOTH ON THE SAME BILL IN JANUARY 1996 . . . . BECK WAS ONE DIFFERENT DUDE !!!

MY DEAR AND NOW DEPARTED HOMBRE, MARIO SPINA, WAS PUTTING TOGETHER A DOCO OF A GIG CALLED 'SUMMERSAULT', AN OUTDOOR FESTIVAL THAT VISITED THE COAST IN JANUARY OF 1996, PEAK SUMMER, STINKIN HOT AND READY TO ROCK AND ROLL !!!

On the bill were The Beasties, Foofighters, Sonic Youth, Beck, Rancid, Pavement, Bris Vegas band Pangea and some others I can't recall, and a skate demo that I'm pretty sure featured a fella by the name of Max Schaaf . . . . Mars had organised all the paperwork, the cameras, passes, the artist interviews and the other bullshit needed to pull this sort of caper off properly . . . . as I'd spent five years of my life singing and ruining my liver in a band with him, Mario asked if I would like to do the artist interviews, I thought about it for a nano second and said "fuck yes" . . . .

We were denied access to both the Beasties and the Foofighters, but had carte blanche on all the others, un fucking real, I was not surprisingly, a bit excited about the prospect. All I had to do was basically talk to the artist while Mars and Johnny did the shoot and the sound.



As fate would have it, the entire project got tied up in red tape and copyright issues and never saw the light of day and now Mars is seven years in the ground, we can never find out what became of all the footage . . . . nonetheless, that day I got to have a yarn and hang out with Lars and the Rancid crew for a couple of hours, full on those boys were, ask a few questions of the Sonic Youth drummer, whose name I forget only every time, and the same with Pavemant, Bikini Kill and the Beckster . . . .

Beck was as out there as Rancid were street level, not in a bad way, just a sorta detatched, in his own loop kinda way, fairly quietly spoken, a bit scatty but intense and open at the same time, and just a little out of his comfort zone with all the rock stuff going on around him . . . . he answered all my questions politely and with good grace, he was just, well, different. Later in the arvo we saw him just wandering about by himself, taking things in and logging them down in that slightly off centre mind of his, a sea of personal calm in an ocean of writhing, sweaty, moshing madness . . . .

"GODSPEED 45/06 X TIM VANDER", VIDEO BY CICERO DE GUZMAN JR . . . . VANDER FROM THE DEATH SCIENCE NEW YORK BRANCH . . . . A SLICK VID OF TIM'S SLICK AND SICK SCOOT SET AGAINST THE BACKDROP OF THE BIG APPLE . . . . CITY, COUNTRY, WHATEVER, JUST RIDE THE FUCKER !!!

As some of you know, I suck at posting pictures, which I will overcome asap, and I'm getting a '74 FXE into shape as my first full 'custom', with the invaluable assistance and guiding hand of my own personal guru, Roscoe Buchanan . . . . I am still struggling with the notion of whether I want to run a jockey shift and a spool only front end or stick a brake on there and have done with it and I've got to admit, having never owned a bike without the front anchor, it does wig me out a little . . . .

Watching Vander, a bloke well familiar with the operating processes, negotiate the streets of N.Y.C doesn't do too much to convince me that this is the thing to do for a hand shift virgin, with no offence in any way intended to the Death Scientist. Then again, you gotta pop the old cherry sometime and perhaps it's just a case of stepping up, going for broke and getting the fuck on with it.



The other thing that I'm tossing up is whether to have the shifter sited in front of my dick or behind my arse, I'm figuring for a rank beginner, maybe between the knees is the better option until ease of operation becomes as second nature us swapping cogs without deploying the clutch is . . . . the foot clutch/hand shift concept probably doesn't weird me out as heavily as relying only on the rear pick to answer any emergency type situation, maybe just do the 'slowly, slowly catchee monkey' thing.

Don't get me wrong here, I reckon I can hold my own in the saddle with most, but it ain't no use me bullshitting myself or others on a subject I have very little first hand experience of, as my old man said, [possibly the only advice I ever took on board at an early age] "if you don't know, ask a bloody question lad" . . . . well, if any one has any pearls of wisdom they feel like casting my way, feel free, it would be greatly appreciated . . . . off for a 'Big Moon' thrash in a few minutes, it's a perfect night to get in a quick 200 kays before an all dayer on tomorrow's holiday Monday, cheers folks.

FTWCO AND CHURCH OF CHOPPERS GO TO CHICAGO . . . . THE 'MIDDLE PERIOD' ADVENTURES OF THE HIGH PRIEST OF SICKLE WORSHIP AND A CAST OF THOUSANDS . . . . YES, IT'S OLD BUT I HAD TO MOVE AWAY FROM THE MAUDLIN AND MOROSE PLACES OF TODAY . . . . WILD AND WOOLY IN THE WINDY CITY !!!!

A NEAT BIT OF SEMI ANCIENT HISTORY OF SOME LOW PROFILE CREW FROM A MOB CALLED FTWCO AND C.O.C, WHOEVER THE FUCK THEY ARE . . . . PROBABLY NOT EVEN AROUND ANYMORE, WENT BELLY UP WHEN THE BUBBLE BURST, HA !!!! NOT BLOODY LIKELY, WORLD DOMINATION IS ONLY A TEESHIRT AWAY . . . .

TEARING UP THE STREETS OF BEULLER TOWN, CROWD SCENES, VAN SHOTS, CHOPS, CHAPS AND CHUMPS . . . . BANG A GONG, GET IT ON IN CHI-TOWN OR KROOZIN WITH KID KURPIUS AND THE KEMOSABE KREW, CALL IT WHAT YOU WILL, I CALL IT A SCHWEET BIT OF AW FUCKIN REET !!!!



HAVE A GROOVY WEEKEND EVERYBODY . . . . GET OUT THERE AND SUCK IT ALL IN, LIVE YOUR LIVES OUT, DON'T JUST THINK ABOUT IT . . . . LIFE'S SHORT, LAP IT UP !!!

RUBBER SIDE DOWN . . . . SHINY SIDE UP . . . . KEEP EM ROLLIN !!!

BEASTIE BOYS - "TRIPLE TROUBLE" (HD) . . . . HERE THEY ARE, I TOTALLY SCREWED THE POOCH ON THE LAST ATTEMPT TO POST . . . . ANYWAY, ENJOY THE BEASTIES AT THEIR PISSTAKIN BEST . . . . MCA, SUPER FLY WHITE GUY R.I.P

THE BEASTIE BOYS - "TRIPLE TROUBLE" (HD) . . . . CLIP DIRECTED BY THE UBER ALTER EGO, "NATHANIEL HORNBLOWER". . . . MCA, MIKE D AND AD-ROCK, PUTTING THE CHEESE BACK INTO THE HOOD . . . . TRYIN TO PSYCHE MYSELF OUT OF THE FUNK I'VE BEEN IN ALL DAY . . . . THERE HAVE BEEN SOME POSITIVES THOUGH . . . .

This is how it went for me this morning . . . . up at six to be greeted by a clear blue sky after two weeks of pissy drizzle and scudding cloud . . . . shit, shower and shave, upstairs, glass of o.j, make my double strength Mocona, light my first Smokin Joe's red for the day, sit down, open laptop and into my world of kindred spirits and assorted social misfits, miscreants and weirdos . . . . brain still attempting to hotwire itself into full functionality . . . . first post check out is Nelson at 'Pakajunk', RIP MCA it reads, hmmmm, that's a bummer, he's left the Beasties, post comment to that effect, go to next post . . . . it's 'ATR', Mr Webber has his post titled 'Adam Yauch RIP', then the synapses and the motor neurons all of a sudden find their mark and it's 'what the fuck !!!!!' . . . . brain's now thumping on the inside of my skull, FUCK, he's not left the band, HE'S FUCKING DEAD !!!!! Now in a state of dazed hyper drive, I scroll down to Max at '4Q Conditioning' . . . . confirmed, Adam Yauch has gone, I read through the Schaafster's excellently touching obit/life-yarn and exit stage left pursued by a Black Dog . . . .  the sky no longer looks quite so blue, my coffee tastes like dirt and the scoot pales into 'just another bike' territory, lid on, jacket on, gloves on, specs on, hit the frog and toad, there was never any chance of leaving this sadness on the doorstep, the news and the black dog follow me for four hours in the saddle . . . . all the way home. Put on 'Paul's Boutique' in the car on the way to get new tires fitted, at last, some respite from the nagging, dumb sensation that have been shadowing my day . . . . I had no idea this event would touch me so heavily and so fucking completely . . . . some things you just can't ever predict, some things can be so powerful you just can't fathom it until later on . . . . some things are all pervading when you least expect it.

'Nathaniel Hornblower' was 47 years old, three years younger than I and too fucking young, in that time, this zany Jewish kid from Brooklyn helped shift the direction of not just hip hop and rap, but modern popular music, he wrote it, directed music vids, sold millons of albums, played to millions of people and he helped the Beasties make folks laugh . . . . he drew attention to the plight of Tibet, it's people and their struggle, met the Dalai Lama too I think, he was a social activist of the best kind and he made a difference.

Today he did something else special and wonderful and I think we all felt it here in Blogland . . . . today, Adam Yauch, aka MCA, aka Nathaniel Hornblower, aka Beastie Boy, brought a shitload of disperate, divergent and dedicated bike lovers from around the world together in a show of respect for him and his music that clearly demonstrates how much he and his beloved fellow Beasties have touched our lives . . . . and that's a fucking beautiful thing.

REST AND RAP IN PEACE ADAM YAUCH . . . . WE'LL BE MISSIN YA.

***** CLICK ON POST TITLE TO WATCH MCA AND THE BEASTIES DOIN "TRIPLE TROUBLE" . . . . I FUCKED WHEN POSTING AND THE VID VANISHED UP IT'S OWN ORIFICE . . . . SORRY.

VALE ADAM YAUCH/MCA OF THE BEASTIES . . . . JUST WOKE UP TO THIS SAD NEWS, DIDN'T EVEN KNOW HE'D BEEN BATTLING CANCER . . . . THE BEASTIES, PIVOTAL, INFLUENTIAL, RESPECTED, PISSTAKERS, FUNMAKERS, DUMB WHITE BOYS, HIP HOP TRAILBLAZERS, FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT . . . . A SAD DAY FOR REAL MUSIC, GONE BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN.

WE ALL HAVE A BEASTIES STORY, BUT FOR A REALLY COOL, WARM, INSIGHTFUL ONE, GO IMMEDIATELTY TO MAX'S "4Q CONDITIONING" BLOG AND READ HIS . . . . IT'S A MAGNIFICENT, TOUCHING, POIGNANT TALE OF WHAT THEY MEANT AND WHO THEY ARE . . . . A TOTAL FUCKING BUMMER . . . . OFF FOR A THRASH ON A GORGEOUS BUT NOW SOMEHOW BLEAK AND GREY GOLD COAST SATURDAY . . . .

R.I.P ADAM YAUCH . . . . LOVE YOUR WORK MAN, ALWAYS.

THE METEORS "WRECKING CREW" . . . . ONE OF THE ORIGINAL PSYCHOBILLY OUTFITS, FLAT OUT AND DANGEROUS . . . . P. PAUL FENECH AND THE REST OF THE INTER STELLAR BODIES WERE REAL PIONEERS IN THE MELDING OF THE ROCKABILLY REVIVAL WITH THE THRASH OF PUNK.

MY FIRST BRANDO STYLE LEATHER JACKET, BOUGHT SECOND HAND FROM A POLICE AUCTION IN 1981, WAS PROUDLY EMBLAZONED WITH THE BAND'S NAME ACROSS THE SHOULDERS AND IT LOOKED THE SHIT . . . . WITH MY NEON BLUE BROTHEL CREEPERS, STRAY CATS LIKE QUIFF AND PALE SKIN, I FITTED NEATLY INTO THE SUN AND SURF IMAGE OF THE GOLD COAST . . . . HAAA !!!!!

THOSE WERE THE DAYS, IF THERE WAS ONE THING SURE TO GET YOU INTO A BLUE EASIER THAN THE PUNK STUFF I'D BEEN INTO FOR THE PRECEEDING COUPLE OF YEARS, THIS WAS IT . . . . CARS AND BIKES AND THE GREASER GIG HADN'T QUITE CAUGHT ON IN SURF CENTRAL . . . . SURE AS FUCK IS DIFFERENT NOW !!!!!

1965 DODGE CORONET SUPER STOCK HEMI . . . . AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING LIKE A BIASED MOPAR NUT [I DO HAVE A '65 SLANT SIX VALIANT IN THE GARAGE] . . . . THE BLUE OVAL CREW, THE GOOD OL' GENERAL, THEY BOTH MADE SOME PRETTY WILD KIT DURING THE HALCYON DAYS OF THE SIXTIES . . . . BUT NONE OF THEM HELD A CANDLE TO WHAT THE FREAKSHOW MOPAR OPERATION WAS LETTING OUT OF THEIR DOORS . . . . THE TOUGHEST CARS EVER MADE !!!!

JUST CAME ACROSS THIS FUCKING INSANE EXAMPLE OF ANOTHER FACTORY ROCKET FROM THE DODGE SIDE OF THE MOPAR TRIUMVIRATE, THE EPIC 'ELEPHANT' DONK UP FRONT AND A WHOLE LOT OF FACTORY DELETE SHIT CLUTTERING UP THE SHELVES BACK IN MOTOWN . . . . THESE THINGS WERE THE GEAR, ALONG WITH THE AFX's AND A LONG, LONG LIST OF WILD GO FAST GOODIES THAT HAD FORD AND G.M FEELING MORE THAN A LITTLE WEAK AT THE KNEES.

FAIR ENOUGH, THEIR STYLING WAS PRONE TO HIT AND MISS AS A RESULT OF PUSHING TO HARD TO KEEP UP WITH THE BIG TWO, BUT AS FAR AS POWERTRAINS AND RELATED GO FAST "MOTOR PARTS" WENT, THEY WERE PRETTY CLOSE TO UNAPPROACHABLE ON THE MEAN STREETS AND MEANER STRIPS ACROSS THE U.S OF A . . . . THE BEACH BOYS WERE FUCKING DREAMING !!!



It wasn't just the Hemi, or even its smaller capacity predecessors, there was the stone killer Max Wedge 413, cross rammed and ready to gun down just about anything in their path or had the lack of smarts to lay down the challenge . . . . most of these monster rigs were capable of being street legal, eventually with all waranty null and void, but the evil AFX wedge motored jiggers were strip use only, so successful were they that the NHRA banned them . . . . only to readmit them when Joe Public went feral at their enforced absence. Then came the 440, another thundering big game killer that left most of the competition spluttering in a cloud of smoke and soiled underwear . . . .

**** Thanks to "samspace81" for letting us view this from his awesome collection of video footage on the dirty old PooTube . . . . super unreal man !!!!

"BSA WINS THE 1954 DAYTONA 200" - DOMINATES IS PROBABLY A MORE APT DESCRIPTION . . . . THE FIRST FIVE PLACES WERE ALL BEEZERS, INCLUDING BOBBY HILL IN 1ST AND THE LEGENDARY DICK KLAMFOTH IN SECOND . . . . REAL MEN, REAL BIKES, REAL SAND, REAL COOL !!!!

Thanks to "TheBeezaGent" for posting this on PooTube, as he said, it's not great quality but worth a look at the old Daytona 'Track" and the racing itself, average speed in this event was something around the the 95 mph mark . . . . it's easy to be dismissive of this kind of info in a day when an off the floor bog stock bike can pull upwards of 175 mph but this was fucking quick for the time and the circuit, make no mistake about that, combine that with track surface considerations, minimal safety gear and you've got some serious big balls racing . . . .



I don't have the specific year in mind but you can see how the Daytona banked oval was already in place here and was really just magnified and extended when the 'proper' track was built not too long after this period . . . . it's always been a scene of some of my most memorable two and four wheeled racing action since I was a wee lad, the banks, the massive speeds attained, especially in the heyday of Nascar throughout the sixties and early seventies, I'll get there one day, even if it's a tad too late.

"CRY BABY" THE DEPPSTER LIP SYNCING JAMES INTVELD, QUIFFED AND LOOKIN SPORTY, RETRO STYLE . . . . WHAT A CLASSIC FLICK, MEGA SUPPORTING CAST . . . . SOME SERIOUSLY FINE FEMME FATALE FLIRTATIONS . . . . GRRRRRR !!!!

I HAVE A REAL RESPECT FOR THE WAY THAT DEPP HAS PURSUED HIS CELLULOID CAREER, CONSISTENTLY CHOOSING LEFT FIELD, FREAKY, ODDBALL, 'CHARACTER' ROLES, HIS OBVIOUS PENCHANT FOR THE WEIRD, BURTON INSPIRED, DARK DUDES HE HAS OFTEN PLAYED . . . .

SO MANY FILMS THAT HAVE THE MAGICAL, CHILDLIKE QUALITIES THAT CONNECT ME WITH MY INNER KID, A MASTER OF BOTH DISGUISE AND ACCENT, I JUST RECKON HE'S MADE A BRILLIANT CAREEER OUT OF BAILING ON THE 'MATINEE IDOL' ROLES SO MANY PRODUCERS WOULD'VE HAD HIM TAKE.



I didn't realise it was Jimmy Intveld voicing the title track and others until quite recently, I can't remember who it was who informed me, might've been a Dan Begakis dude . . . . fuck, too fuzzy with a hangover the size of a really big thing, anyway, thanks for hipping me to the caper. Oddly, I thought his portrayal of Hunter S Thompson was solid but not one of his greatest gigs, I'm also a huge fan of Benicio The Bull and Terry Gilliam the director, I just always felt it should have been done by Jim Jarmusch . . . . no matter, it's all good in the Deppster's hood.

"SUBTERRANEAN HOMESICK BLUES" THE DYLANATOR . . . . HAS ANYONE EVER PISSED OFF THEIR OWN AUDIENCE AS BADLY AS WHEN MR ZIMMERMAN WENT ELECTRIC ???? I DON'T THINK SO . . . . THE SNOBBY ULTRA FOLKIES DESERVED A DECENT TOE UP THE POSTERIOR ANYWAY . . . . FAR TOO MUCH COFFE AND WAYFARERS IN POORLY LIT BASEMENTS !!!!!

The King of Folk turned electric Frankenstein, Zimmie had em all seething when he plugged in, turned up and pissed em off, with a bit of a hand from The Band, he had the then fully charging "Folk" scene in a spastic fit of global dimensions . . . . from Newport to Norwich, his so called 'fans' were busy shitting the nest at the news that the Bobhead had gone 'electric' . . . . ooooooh, naughty boy !!!



I mean, for pity's sake, anything to assist covering that fucking nasal, adenoidal, a-tonal, whining, non musical voice of his, seriously, love the man and his vocals but he can't hold a tune to save his big nosed arse . . . . but that is the glory and the inherent beauty of Bob, couldn't sing to save his soul but went on to write the most significant popular tunes of the post WWII era . . . . when we're all dead and buried, the people of the year 2117 won't be singin 'Hairpie For Stephen' or 'Hit Me Baby',  but there's a fair chance they'll still be singin 'Mr Tamborine Man' and 'The Hurricane' . . . .

You don't have to love him, shit, you don't even have to like the religion swappin, accoustic coppin, big nosed snottin, British twin droppin Dylan head . . . . all you gotta be able to do is relax into the undeniable reality he is the leading light in the last sixty years of popular music . . . . that's all !!!

FROM THE 'FUCKING LEGENDS' DEPT, CREEDENCE "SWEET HITCH HIKER" . . . . FOR ALL THE CREW IN OAKLAND AND THE BAY AREA . . . . AND ALL THE CREW IN MELBOURNE AND THE BAY AREA . . . . NO MORE REQUIRED.

"RIDE THE LOCUST 2009", ANOTHER VISION OF THE 'ON THE ROAD IDYLL' THAT NEEDS TO BE REVISITED . . . . KID KURPIUS AND HIS KRONIES, CHIEF AMONG THEM, HENCHMAN HARLOW ON THE ROAD AND ROLLIN . . . . ALL LEGITIMATE COOL SHIT GETS BETTER WITH AGE !!!

DECIDED TO GRAB JUST A QUICK LOOK AT THIS 6 MINUTES OF STAIGHT UP, EARTHY, NO BULLSHIT, UNCONTRIVED RECENT SICKLE FILM HISTORY FROM MASTER SHOOTER JOSH KURPIUS . . . . HAD NO INTENTION OF POSTING IT, TEN SECONDS IN AND HERE IT IS, IMPROVES WITH AGE LIKE A NICELY STRUCTURED NEBBIOLO, THE DUDE HAS SUCH AN EYE, SUCH A FEEL FOR HIS MEDIUM, NO HINT OF WANK VALUE, NOT A SNIFF OF PRETENSION, STILLS OR ACTION . . . .



It's been kinda fascinating to sporadically go back to this over the last couple of years and read the continually growing comments section on the PooTube post, so many crew 'get it', so many are touched by what this piece of posterity represents . . . . that exchange and interaction between artist, subject and audience is a fucking rare and special thing, it proves conclusively that when Josh, astride his nude metal mustang that has become almost an extension of himself, manages to successfully capture not only the footage, but moreover, the 'ness', the 'vibe', the essence of what he felt at the time of pointing the lens and pushing the go button . . . .

It embodies and emparts the very nature of being on the road, you, your ride and some close mates who all 'get it', all share and empathise with the feeling, the rush, the sense of belonging to the moment, the place and the group . . . . when all the other shit is done and dusted, all the perpheral crap is consigned to the never-never, it's those core sensations and feelings that are left to become fond and warmly recounted recollections of days in the wind with friends . . . . thanks to Kid Kurpius, Brian Harlow, Mitch Cotie and company for the chance to spy on one of their many such moments.

SR-71 'BLACKBIRD' R.C MODEL . . . . A FLAGRANT CASE OF ABSOLUTELY SWEET FUCK ALL TO DO WITH BIKES, CARS, SKATIES, MUSIC, VINO OR ANY OF MY USUAL SUSPECTS . . . . BUT, SHIT, IT'S SO WICKEDLY COOL !!!!

Definitely one of my top five planes of all time, the Lockheed SR-71 "Blackbird", the initial idea was conceived in the very late 50's, that's right youngens, the 50's, by the hot rodder of the military aviation industry, Kelly Johnson, and his twisted team at the epically super secret 'Skunkworks' . . . . it was up and flying 'fairly fast' [Mach III plus] by late in 1963, I'm pretty sure the speed records are still in tact, and it continued in service until the late nineties.

A titanium body, to withstand the temps generated at the speed this beast was capable of on a sustained basis, that leaked gas like a sieve until the panels heated up and expanded, was just one of thousands of technological firsts this plane gave to avionics and aeronautics. The Yanks had to bullshit the Ruskies that all the titanium they required to build the thirty odd things was going to be used to make spoons or bedpans for the Hollywood elite to avoid raising their suspicions . . . .



I know, this is just a model, but who the fuck can afford a real one, and besides, there's oodles of miles of footage on the genuine, erection inducing, full size, 1:1 version . . . . however, there are fuck all, insanely detailed, fully flying, JET POWERED, radio controlled model Blackbirds just blobbing about in every suburban garage . . . . and that's why it's here, the whole shebang is clearly the brainchild of a bloke, German I believe, who has slipped his moorings and slid off into the ether of a parallel universe . . . . so please, even if you generally think model planes are for geeky man-boy accountant types, loosen the fuck up and check this shit out . . . . THIS IS VERY COOL !!!!

THERE'S BIKES IN THEM THERE HILLS !!!! STOLE THIS FROM THE "SPEEDMETAL" BLOG COURTESY OF MR H. TONK . . . . . HIS DOCUMENTATION OF LAST YEAR'S STURGIS JOURNEY . . . . AN HONEST, WELL COMPILED AND EDITED TRAVELOGUE, COMPLETE WITH FULLY BITCHIN SOUNDTRACK !!!!

A WARM AND FUZZY [IN A GOOD, NON LIMP SORTA WAY] PICTORIAL RECORDING OF A GROUP OF FOLK ON THEIR WAY TO AND THROUGH THE 'BIG ONE', STURGIS 2011 . . . .

REALLY COOL FEEL, GREAT SHOTS AND, AS STATED, A FERKIN BUTT KICKIN BUNCH OF VIBES SETTING THE MOOD JUST PERFECTLY . . . . GIVE IT A CRACK, YOU'LL LOVE IT . . . . THANKS SPEEDMETALLERS AND MISTER TONK, ESQ.